chat space

2008-07-29T16:28:00.003-05:00

so long to this blog

as you can read on a new post on a new blog...i am shutting the doors to this blog link. come see me at http://mrshubby.blogspot.com. i picked out new colors just for you.

2008-07-10T09:43:00.003-05:00

the honeymoon's over...

well, now that it all is said and done, the nuptials and trip were a huge success. it rained on our wedding day, which as everyone would tell a bride is "good luck!" - which i will choose to believe at this point. because i'm pretty sure it's not good luck at all, it's a big pain in the ass. but nonetheless, the weather cleared, we said our vows and had one hell of a party if i do say so myself.

then on to europe. the trip was great - paris is freaking amazing, prague is incredible - and i survived my first international escapade. while i did miss my diet coke and the english language, it was a great experience. and i got to watch robin hood:prince of thieves in czech, which was truly moving.

then it was back to the ohio/northern kentucky area for another wedding. as though we haven't had enough. but in all seriousness, it was a great time and another one of my closest friends is now an old married woman. congrats mr and mrs niehaus.

one thing that i have learned through all of this is that st. louis clearly can't survive without me. i take two trips and the whole place goes nuts. chuy's closed and a-b got sold...what is going on around here!?!? i heard a rumor that chuy's is just moving - but cannot confirm. i can only hope...

2008-06-25T11:41:00.003-05:00

squirrels and 9 days off work

the joy of being a home-owner...you have your own yard, your own driveway, your own privacy...and your very own pet squirrels living in your attic. our neighbor stopped us as we were walking in the house the other day, and let us know that she's seen squirrels coming out of our roof recently. in her words there are "more than 10, more than 20". i'm not sure that squirrels live in packs like that, and i'm sure that she's a nutbag - however, the thought of all those little rodents camping out in the attic is not pleasant. so it's operation squirrel destruction at the soon-to-be husband household.

the good news is that today is my last day at work until july 9. sah-weet. we're off to the hamilton county court system to swear that we're not related and are over the age of 17, then to oxford for the whole shebang. then paris, then prague, then home home on the range -- at which time i'll be living in our house! no more living like a gypsy out of a suitcase in my car!

so long till next month, my avid readers.

2008-06-19T16:21:00.003-05:00

i hate it when my underwear malfunctions...

today, news came out that a woman in los angeles is suing victoria's secret for lost wages while she suffered a scratched cornea. wait...what? yes, that's what it says.

A Los Angeles woman is suing the lingerie-producing giant Victoria's Secret over a thong gone wrong.

Fifty-two-year-old Macrida Patterson, who works in parking enforcement for the Los Angeles Department of Transportation, says she suffered a scratched cornea after either a pendant or a metal fastener snapped off a pair of panties and struck her in the eye.

"It does seem sort of unbelievable at first," said Patterson's attorney, Jason Buccat. But, he said, his client's injuries will "affect her for the rest of her life."

Tammy Roberts Myers, a Victoria's Secret spokeswoman, said the company had not seen the lawsuit and had no comment.

The thong, a Victoria's Secret Sexy Little Thing low-rise v-string, had a heart-shaped pendant attached to the fabric with a metal fastener, according to the lawsuit. When Patterson was changing after work, the metal piece snapped, creating a "slingshot effect," and either the pendant or the metal piece "cut her eye," Buccat said.

After the incident, Patterson drove home but "barely made it" because of her eye injury, Buccat said. He added that Patterson, who referred calls for comment to her lawyer, suffered a scratched cornea and had to miss two weeks of work.

Buccat would not release the name of Patterson's ophthalmologist, saying the trial is still in discovery. New York ophthalmologist Dr. Thomas Kuhns, who did not treat Patterson, said it is hard to comment without seeing the injury, but "a cornea abrasion usually clears up in a day or two."

Patterson is seeking compensation for lost wages, but Buccat claims the case is not about money.

The case "holds retailers accountable for products they sell," he said.

ok, first of all - the obvious question...was she putting the underwear on her head or on her ass? i don't know about the rest of the population, but no matter how many pendants are attached to my underpants, there is never a chance of one of them flying off and hitting my face. perhaps i've been putting my underwear on the wrong way all these years?

second of all, if this in fact really happened to a person, wouldn't most of us be a little embarrassed and keep the incident to ourselves, rather than publicly suing the world's largest undergarment retailer? just a thought.

and lastly. this is one of the comments that was posted on the article on abcnews.com. it pretty much sums up what everyone is thinking...

"I have no idea what the women looks like and I feel bad she is hurt but dollars to donuts I bet she has a butt as big as the sun.
Posted by:stop2think 2:26 PM"

stop2think, you are spot on my friend. spot on.

2008-06-12T09:29:00.002-05:00

woo - two days in a row!

i can't stand to even write about this - but i'm a bit worried that good old A-B might actually get bought up. poor st. louis...we can't keep a company here to save our lives. i'm sure that the purchase would be a great deal for the top execs at a-b (reports are saying auggie III would walk away with $300MM...not too shabby), but come on. it's budweiser, locally brewed and locally owned. i enjoy a stella from time to time, but that doesn't mean that i want the same company to own all my beers.

so in all of the uproar, there are many "save a-b" petition sites circulating around...and i'd like to know just how effective these could possibly be. here's an international company willing to spend $46.3 billion on a takeover, and we've got 36,000 signatures on some web site? oh, and gov. blunt says he's got our back....riiiiight. what's he going to do, chain himself to the brewery? it's all up to the shareholders, and we can only hope they make a good decision.

this article says the belgians don't want to take corporate offices out of st. louis, and it would become the hq for their north american operations and their international operations. that sounds nice, but it doesn't really make sense that they'd move everything here. or could st. louis actually be the beer capital of the world?

stay tuned folks - we'll see what happens!

2008-06-11T16:52:00.002-05:00

you'll love this...

i'm getting ready to leave work momentarily - but i just had to share this with someone. enjoy!

2008-05-30T09:12:00.004-05:00

aaaaaaaaand it's friday.

i have been looking forward to this week for some time now...ever since my boss came to my desk and told her the magic words that make all employees do a happy dance in their cubie..."i'm going on vacation for a week." WAHOO! working when my boss isn't here is THE best. not only because she's an "interesting" person (to put it nicely) but because i can catch up on all of my internet surfing and facebook stalking.

but alas, it's friday and my week o' fun is coming to an end. i'm going out with a bang by taking an extra long lunch and going to the mall.

after last weekend's bachelorette party/shower/facials/erin extravaganza weekend - i'm looking forward to a weekend with only one event to attend (grad party) and lots of laying around and watching our new HD tv (how did we survive before HD?). and potentially playing my new wii game - karaoke revolution presents american idol - complements of my bud christy. best. wedding. shower. gift. ever. perhaps i'll take a picture of my rocking out with my mini-mike and share with you all.

speaking of bachelorette parties - i must confess that i was not keen on the idea of donning a cheap veil or tacky attire to attract attention to the fact that i was the bachelorette. but my family and friends had a much different take on the situation - decking me out complete with flashing-penis-veil (yes, it had a battery pack), miss america style sash, and "suck for a buck" t-shirt. i had a moment of wanting to refuse all of the flair, but quickly realized i'd get through it with the help of two bottles of wine and 5 gin & sodas. aaaaaand i did. enjoy this:

in case you were wondering - that last pic is not exactly a face that i regularly make. so i can only attribute it to the booze. which is fantastic. happy weekend everyone!

2008-05-21T13:37:00.002-05:00

reasons why today is a good day

today may be just a regular old hump day to most people, but for me it is proving to be a very exciting day. first of all, the AI finale is on tonight - and i'm very anxious to see who wins. though i'm not looking forward to having to sit through two hours of ridiculous-ness, including fake boxing matches and puns that make me gag, just to see 5 seconds that make the show what it is.

secondly, the tomato & mozzarella salad is back at bread company. summertime is officially on its way. and i'll be eating this at least 3 times a week until they steal it away in september.

lastly, only two more days until all of my buddies visit me for a bachelorette party and shower weekend. oh how i enjoy looking forward to a weekend of shameless binge drinking with a monday off to finish. it's going to be awesome. and no rain in the forecast! wahoo.

2008-05-09T11:54:00.003-05:00

so what

since i haven't been able to think of anything to write recently (unless you are interested in DIY wedding programs, bridal gown alterations or catering menu negotiations - which I can certainly speak to at this point) i thought i'd give you a little update on my life.

#1 i've switched my morning TV routine from saved by the bell to the today show. it was a sad day when i said goodbye to zack and kelly, but i was starting to notice that I lived in more of a bubble than usual. people would ask me, "did you hear about those mormons?" or "how about the latest with brittany spears?" and sadly, i could offer no response. so i'm getting my daily filling of junior-high-level news from matt and meredith now.

#2 only 50 days till i'm a mrs. i'm not panicking about saying the vows, but i'm starting to get a little nervous about getting everything done before the day rolls around. i've got about 2 actual free weekends between now and 6/28 with a plethora of bachelorette/showers/weddings to attend in between. then i take about two weeks off work for the event/honeymoon, attend one more wedding, and one more at-home-pseudo-reception-backyard-party...and then the show will be over. then i'll just be married. how boring.

#3 american idol is coming to an end, and i'm terribly sad about it. this season just hasn't given me the gratification that seasons past have done. some of my favorites left early, leaving a group of guys that are so-so (minus david cook, my facebook friend) and a girl that i'm not crazy about. and if dreadlocks didn't go soon, it was really going to get ugly. anyways - just a few more weeks and then i'm stuck watching 'so you think you can dance' to satisfy my reality tv appetite.

in other news - there is a sinkhole in texas that is eating up the state. things are falling in left and right, and it hasn't stopped yet. luckily, my trusty today show newscaster reported from within 100 feet from the edge, admitting that specialists recommended not going any closer than 1,000 feet. what a champ that guy is.

i'm heading back to the great state of ohio this weekend for my ex-roommate/bridesmaid's shower and bachelorette extravaganza. should be a weekend full of cosmopolitans, penis veils and shower games. can't wait!

2008-04-16T13:50:00.003-05:00

best thing i've come across in a while

get ready for hours of entertainment...go to someecards.com. it's hilarious. you will undoubtedly make friends and enemies all because of this site.

one of my favorites:

other than that and american idol, i honestly have nothing interesting to offer...sorry about that folks. hey, at least the weather is getting nice - maybe it won't be snowing in may after all!

happy elimination day

2008-03-11T11:48:00.002-05:00

oh i miss college

and because i miss it so much, i have the bi-weekly student newspaper emailed to me so i can keep up on the goings-on of oxford, oh. there's not much...but they do always include the "police beat" - a list of the best i-can't-believe-how-drunk-that-kid-was stories of the week. this one is particularly enjoyable. you gotta be real out of it to not see a snowplow

Snowplow nearly strikes intoxicated first-year male

Miami University Police requested backup from Oxford police at 3 a.m. Saturday regarding an intoxicated male. Officers were told the male was walking down the middle of East Spring Street near Poplar Street when he was almost hit by an oncoming snowplow. He was identified as first-year Holden Crossland, 19. He reportedly smelled strongly of alcohol and was having difficulty standing. Crossland allegedly told officers he drank three or four rounds of alcohol that evening. He was cited with underage intoxication and transported back to Emerson Hall.

2008-03-03T10:00:00.003-06:00

the baby is here!

sorry to keep you all waiting for the news - but the baby is here! he wasn't a leapling, which is a shame. but nonetheless, he's a healthy baby, so all is good. george christopher:

i also found an interesting article for you to enjoy this fine monday morning...http://www.denverpost.com/headlines/ci_8371937. it's so bad, i don't even know where to begin. but the photo is PRICELESS. anyways enjoy.

lastly, i'd like to discuss our weather. if we don't get spring-for-good soon here, people are going to start getting nutty. we had a glimpse yesterday, and it was spectacular. but unfortunately, 2-6" of sleet and snow are expected tonight. awesome. the schools have already used up all their snow days - and some high school seniors are going to have to go to school after their graduation to make up for the time off. i would be SO pissed if that happened to me. anyways - hopefully this is the last of the wintery mix and we'll be off to sun and warmth in time for st. pat's day.

happy first monday of march everyone.

ps - i posted a poll over there -----> if you want to vote. i'll change it every week so stay tuned. unless no one posts responses, then i'm going to delete it so i don't look like a loser who writes a blog for 3 people.

2008-02-29T13:15:00.002-06:00

happy leap day

on this festive of holidays, i was going to try to find lots of fun facts about leap years and leap days to share with you - but alas, leap day is not much more interesting than the facts you learned in 3rd grade. we get it every four years because a year is actually 356.245 days - and since it's not exactly 365.25 days, every 400 years skips the leap day.

it's also folklore that women can only propose marriage in leap years (as initiated by st. patrick). and some queen back in the day created legal fines for men who did not accept the proposals. and then the greeks believe that it is bad luck to marry in a leap year...good thing i'm irish/german.

so, the very fun part of this leap day is that my sister-in-law is in labor and might have her very own leapling! i'm hoping this baby comes before midnight tonight.

i also read that if you have an annual salary, you aren't actually paid for leap day...i'm not sure if that's true or not, but either way, i'm going to slack off a bit extra today at work just in case. i'm not working if they aren't paying.

hope you are having a happy leap day - if you live in stl, it looks like a spring-ish weekend is in store so enjoy it.

2008-02-18T20:26:00.002-06:00

get up to speed stl

the world of tv is going digital, and my hometown is ill-prepared. apparently 19% of homes in st. louis are incapable of receiving digital signals, as compared to 10.9% across the us. are we seriously that backwoods here? don't worry, we're not dead last...just close to it.

this transition to digital, along with the introduction of hd, is the first time in my life that i've truly felt behind the times in technology. i find all of the tv lingo and specifications very confusing, and i'm not very interesting in learning them either. i now know what my grandparents felt like when people told them they had to have a computer at home. if i feel this way at 25, it's going to be a long road for me to figure out what the hell i'm doing.

in other news, the final 24 have been chosen for ai. man, is it going to be a great year. i have 14 weeks of singing and voting to look forward to. if that's not good news, i don't know what is.

2008-02-08T14:38:00.000-06:00

a few things that i think you should know about

i have had the privilege of being exposed to a few new fun things this week - that I'd like to share with you. you can choose to like them or not, and i will continue to like them myself.

1. pandora.com

if you listen to music, and like music and hope to keep finding music to like that isn't the same 5 songs you have liked since you were 18 (this was kind of me before finding pandora) - you HAVE to get on pandora. basically you can enter in any song or singer that you like, and it will identify a never-ending playlist that resembles it. the "music genome project" basically assigns a DNA code to just about any song, and will find songs like it for you to listen. the best part? it's free.

2. gladys hardy

this was going to be a lot cooler - but i can't embed youtube today...perhaps i shouldn't be doing this from work. anyways - it's funny, so watch it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuT0Zf3kJX0

that's all for today, have to do some actual work now. i'll be preparing for my marriage, babysitting and doing laundry all weekend. man am i boring.

2008-02-01T10:43:00.000-06:00

oh geez...

so my good friend kirby informed me that i'm a blog-slacker, and that i have ended a record-breaking monthly blogging streak for 15 months with my recent state of hiatus. what a shame...i was hoping to win some kind of record for this. damn.

well anyways - my life since last post has been filled with lots of business and craziness: working like a fool, planning my wedding, and watching american idol. all the important things in life.

speaking of american idol, i think the novelty of the "bad karoake on tv" has finally worn off. fox is trying to hang on, but they've even shifted the shows since the beginning of this season. they are showing more good people, less cheesy back stories...and i like it. actually, i'd be fine if they started the whole season with hollywood.

in other news - there's a presidential race going on. did you hear? well, if you haven't, i'll give you a quick recap. for the dems, black man v. white woman: the showdown. for the gop, old v. mormon: gauntlet. i think mccain is a standup guy - but MAN is he old. if he were to take office, he would be our oldest pres at 72. maybe he should just retire and play bocce instead.

and speaking of old presidents...i wondered if mccain would actually be the oldest president, and it's true (according to wikipedia at least). so i wondered, who is the oldest president now? that would be reagan. and the youngest? you're thinking jfk, right? WRONG. crazy, i know...but look it up. i'm not telling you - you'll have to do the research yourself. keep your mind active, you know.

so friends - this has been a quite terrible blog, but i have to call a few printers about wedding invitations, so i'm signing off. enjoy your mardi gras/superbowl weekend...if you were hit by the snowstorm of the century, make a snow angel. actually, build an igloo and watch the superbowl in it. that would be awesome.

see you next week.

ps. it's theodore roosevelt. i felt bad not telling you.

2007-12-31T09:08:00.000-06:00

a look back on '07

here's a taste of what happened in my life and around the world this year, whether you care or not ;)

1. year o' moving: i moved out of my apartment and into the basement of my fine (and generous) friend karen...only to move out 6 months later and back in with my parents.

2. travelling wo-man: i spent much of my spring and early summer on planes, in cars, in hotel rooms, and staying with friends. a zeta reunion in oxford; trip to boston to see amy, the red sox, and a whole bunch of people who work for catalogs; virginia for some focus groups; indy for some boozing with my bestest friends...i always thought i would like to travel all the time, but now i'm not so sure...

3. VT: the event that shocked and dismayed the country, with a cold and tragic flashback to school shootings of the past.

4. ball and chain: on june 21, i got engaged to my future-hubby, 'hubby'. by this time next year, i'll be mrs. husband. then i'll be able to say, "this is my husband, matt husband" (my mom gets a real kick out of that)

5. weddingpalooza: attended some, participated in a few, and started planning my own. the statment "everyone is getting married" became the catchphrase of the year.

6. baby kate: shannon and abe had their first baby, a girl! she's freaking adorable and we love her. kathleen elizabeth.

7. kid #2: toph and sharon announced their pregnancy with their second child, in the same month that baby kate was born and i got engaged. we like to keep things interesting around here. then, at christmas, they told us it's a boy. yay!

8. home on the range: matt and i (mostly just matt...) bought a house! new to home-owning, this was a real experience that i'm not interested in participating in again soon. the house is awesome, and i can't wait to move in.

9. 90 years: my aunt ruthie turned 90. she lives in florida and travelled up to stl for a big party. i could only hope to be in her health at 90 -- she delivers meals on wheels to the "old people", as she calls them.

10. strike out: writers go on strike across the country. say goodbye to television shows that have scripts, and hello to a million reality series. luckily, american idol doesn't require the talent of writers to continue on.

happy 08 to all - hope it's a good one. see you next year.

2007-12-19T08:45:00.000-06:00

follow up to the holiday party...

just wanted to let everyone know - the holiday party WAS as miserable as expected. people lined up to eat dollar roll sandwiches and brownies, we drank pepsi out of styrofoam cups...we even played musical chairs. well, i didn't play - but a representative of every part of the company played. the director of IT won, but the CEO came in a close second. no prizes for winners, just glory.

so after leaving work 45 minutes late, i ventured to my mom and dads in west county, only to realize that west county drivers are by far the worst drivers in the midwest. i hope they all quit their jobs when hwy 40 shuts down, so that i never have to deal with them again.

happy 6 days till christmas...

2007-12-18T11:41:00.000-06:00

holiday par-tay

nothing says christmas/hanukkah/kwanzaa/atheist holiday of choice like the notorious company holiday party. my previous job - they certainly knew how to throw a party. in my first year, we had an all-inclusive 8-midnight party at a local restaurant/bar. employees were hammered, drinks were spilled, bosses were dancing on tables - it was spectacular.

so the next year, i think they realized that was a bit over the top, and out of budget, so we had an afternoon bowling party. the whole company left work at noon and hit the lanes. beers, buffet style food, bowling tournament, stale stench of cigarettes - what more could you ask for? it was a great time. (also, it was my last day of work at that company, so it was superb)

well, now that i'm with my new company for the first holiday party experience, i had high hopes of something super cool - like karaoke at chili's. i was greatly disappointed the day i received this email:

Hi!
You are invited to our Holiday Party! We will have
appetizers, desserts, soda and water.
We will also have a raffle to give away 3 Gift Baskets!
When: Tuesday, 12/18/07
Where: 2nd Floor of our building, in the open area outside of the
administration offices
Time: 4pm-6pm
*You do not need to RSVP
**You will be given your raffle tickets at the party
Thanks and hope to see you there!

so not only does this holiday party not involve drinks, it happens from 4pm - 6pm, when our business closes 5pm. Merry Christmas! Feel free to stay at work an hour late!

and to make it worse, the location ("the open area outside of the admin offices") is actually the open area right f-ing next to my desk. i couldn't even skip it if i wanted to. sons of bitches.

so in about an hour and a half, i'll be enjoying a tasty dessert accompanied by a bottle of water, all on the company's dime. grrrrrreat.

and if your holiday party doesn't suck as much as mine, i don't want to hear about it.

2007-12-03T15:34:00.000-06:00

i hate the dentist and why i'm buying all xmas presents online

so today, i had to go to the dentist for a filling. my first filling since i was about 10, i was actually quite nervous. they assured me it was no problem and that i could return to work after the hour-long appointment. this was true - i did return to work, but they failed to mention to me that when i returned to work i would be talking like a goober that got punched in the mouth. not only that, the dentist went a little crazy with the lidocaine shot and i swallowed a mouthful. if you ever wondered, that WILL make you throw up.

so needless to say, this hasn't been the most fun monday. but the weekend on the other hand was a good time - i moved out of my basement dwelling on pembroke (tear) and in with my parents. this is the 5th time i've moved in three years - only to be moving again in june 08 after i am an old married woman.

and the decision to move home with my parents? it has it's ups and downs. the down is that they live in west b.f. about 30 minutes from everything. the up is that i will have homecooked dinner and packed lunches for the next 6 months. or if anyone is interested in a bonfire party, i've got the hookup.

so the other interesting event that happened this weekend occurred at the galleria, aka hell in december. i should know better than to step foot in a mall at this time of year, but i couldn't help myself, as i needed to use a discount card to victorias secret that i received in the mail before it expired (and i needed new underpants as well).

so i walk into vs, and am first off shocked by all of the very young girls in there picking out some extremely scandalous undergarments. some of these girls looked 12 - sick.

i pick out my 5 for $25 underwears, and one extra for the "free pair" that my card offers. i get in line to pay, and the cashier informs me that the "free pair" that i have picked out has to be a certain kind, which i did not know. there are people in line behind me, but i rush over to pick out a pair that will be free while they wait (i'm that girl).

as i rush back to the line with a pair of green and white polka dotted granny underpants, i realize that the people directly behind me in line are my co-workers (a guy and a girl - who before this i did not realize that they even knew each other). i casually say hello, as though a) they did not just have to wait for me to pick out underwear b) didn't just see the granny panties i picked out and c) aren't half as uncomfortable as i am at this moment.

i feel my face getting red, the cashier tells me how much my total is - then i can't find my credit card. the girl co-worker is telling me some story about her stepmom and i am not paying attention at all, like the flake that i have turned into, trying to find the stupid credit card. i manage to find it, pay, sign the receipt and pretend like i have something really important to go to and can't stay and chat.

i haven't been that embarrassed since i threw up on myself at six flags when i was 12. i rode mo-mo the monster three times in a row - what do you expect?

2007-11-16T10:02:00.000-06:00

you's a ho

so, in australia (that crazy country), they are asking santa's not to say "ho ho ho" this christmas in sydney because some women will find it offensive. no, i'm not kidding. really. i swear. it's even on fox news!

Australian Santas Asked Not to 'Ho Ho Ho'
Thursday , November 15, 2007

By Janet Fyfe-Yeomans and Amanda Grant

SYDNEY, Australia —

He is an unlikely revolutionary, but this Christmas, Santa is a rebel with a claus.

He is having the last laugh on political correctness — and it's a great big fat belly laugh.

Santas across Sydney, Australia, are rebelling against attempts to ban their traditional greeting of "ho, ho, ho" in favor of "ha, ha, ha."

Recruitment firm Westaff — which supplies hundreds of Santas across the country — has told its trainees that the "ho ho ho" phrase could frighten children and could even be derogatory to women.

Two Santa hopefuls reportedly quit the course because of the hullabaloo of the ho, ho, ho.

One would-be Santa has told The Daily Telegraph he was taught not to use "ho, ho, ho" because it was too close to the American slang for prostitute. He also quit.

"Gimme a break," said Julie Gale, who runs a campaign against sexualizing children called Kids Free 2B Kids. "We are talking about little kids who do not understand that 'ho, ho, ho' has any other connotation, and nor should they."

"Leave Santa alone," she added.

-----

you know, i think it's about time this creepy old perv "santa" was reprimanded for his behavior. watching children while they play, keeping lists of their names, labelling them "naughty" - even luring them with treats and gifts. i mean, everyone learns as a kid - this kind of perpetrator is dangerous. he's a stranger with candy and has his eye on the youngins'. and to top it off, he's been getting away with yelling profanity at these innocent babies! calling them ho's and obviously degrading their self-esteem from a very young age.

i personally am glad that this came about, because we've all been living blind of the fact that santa is nothing more than a morally corrupt old man, running a factory with vertically challenged people as his employees. the horror! hasn't santa watched "little people big world"? these people can lead perfectly normal lives, and don't have to be subjected to this non-stop toymaking labor.

so hear this santa, you think you can get away with your jollitry and games, but we're on to you. by next year, your holiday will be nothing more than a day off work with a plastic "family" tree in the living room. we will not allow your attempts to bring light to our bleak winter season. and watch out david - we're after your star next.

2007-11-02T16:15:00.001-05:00

how old is creepy?

the other day, i visited my local st. louis bread company to enjoy a bowl of chicken and wild rice soup with a co-worker. we waited in the usual line to place our orders, and when i reached the front of the line, i noticed the employee there to take my order was an elderly friendly-looking gentleman, who appeared to be having a great time taking people's orders.

old guy: well hello there young lady? how are you doing today? what can i get you?
me: i'll take the you-pick-two with chicken and wild rice soup and a tuscan chicken sandwich.
old guy: ok, great choices. i love the chicken and wild rice soup - it's delicious!
me: (thinking) i know that dummy, that's why i ordered it.
old guy: now would you like to buy a cookie with your meal for just 99 cents? it's our special right now.
me: no thank you.
old guy: oh come on - get a cookie - they are delicious! with your lovely figure, you can have a cookie with your lunch.
me: (thinking) did i hear that right?
me: (out loud) uh...thanks?
old guy: my friend is a fitness instructor, and she eats our cookies! but i get them for her with my employee discount.
me: i'll pass on the cookie, but i'd like a drink with my meal.
old guy: ok great! how would you like to pay?
(note: i have been holding my credit card in front of him for 3 minutes at this point)
old guy: on the magic credit card, great. your name is erin? a beautiful irish name for a beautiful girl. i'm irish, you know. john o'finnigan. i'm travelling to ireland next spring.
me: that's great, though i'm actually german.
old guy: well, ok. the germans and the irish get along now-a-days anyways! enjoy your lunch and watch that lovely figure!

i ran away from the counter as quickly as i could, so that he wouldn't come up with something else to talk to me about...and got to the table where my co-worker was sitting, already eating his food. i told him what the old guy said and why it took so long, and he brought up an interesting point. if this guy were 30, i would have thought he was a total creep - but somehow at 70, a guy can totally get away with it.

so at what age does a guy stop being a creepy perv? i'm thinking somewhere around 64...possibly 60, but that might be pushing it.

that's all i've got for today. that and a 9:30 softball game tonight that i'd rather not attend...but it's the last game of the season (FINALLY) so at least i have a break until next fall. if we win this one, we come in second, surprisingly.

enjoy the extra hour of your weekend.

2007-10-31T16:35:00.000-05:00

now that's just plain stupid

Teenager escapes prison in suitcase
Tue Oct 30, 2007 4:55pm EDT

BERLIN (Reuters) - A 19-year-old German woman has escaped from prison by hiding in a friend's suitcase.

The fugitive hid inside the large case when her 17-year-old fellow inmate was released from the youth prison in northwest Germany on Friday, Lower Saxony ministry spokesman Dennis Weilmann said on Monday.

The girl simply walked out of the building with her friend concealed in her luggage, Weilmann said.

"Our staff are going to make sure they inspect big suitcases more carefully in the future," Weilmann said.

Neither of the teenagers has since been caught. Both had been jailed for theft. The escaped prisoner had less than two weeks left to serve.

-------

i was completely following up until the very last sentence. the girl didn't want to be in prison, she came up with great escape plan, it worked...but she was only there for two more weeks? come on...that's so ridiculous. it's like getting caught using a fake id the night before your 21st birthday. plain old stupid.

2007-10-18T15:30:00.000-05:00

oh what people will do

what would make a grown man duct-tape high heels to his feet? has to be something good, right? say, i don't know, perhaps a free vacation? possibly. or some free money - but would have to be enough to make it worth while - $1,000? maybe. OR what about a pair of tickets to see hannah montana in concert? ABSOLUTELY.

yesterday, local radio station held a high heel derby for men only to compete for two tickets to see hannah montana tonight. clearly, it was well worth buying women's size 20 high heels, missing work, standing in the rain, and running in circles for the chance to see billy ray cyrus' daughter perform.

and even worse, people are paying up to $250 PER TICKET to see this kid in concert. she's outselling bruce springsteen for pete's sake.

i mean seriously, what is the world coming to?!?!?! first of all, little kids are going to concerts. secondly, parents are spending a small fortune to get them there. and lastly, the man who brought us achy breaky heart has procreated.

i can't take it any more than that.

2007-10-12T10:14:00.000-05:00

it's finally here...

it seems as thought fall has finally come upon us, and in celebration of the cool weather, i will be spending the weekend eating soup, drinking hot cider and wearing hoodies.

really though, my third-to-last softball game is tonight, we shouldn't have a problem winning, and the mosquitos that were infesting the field the last few weeks should finally have gone underground for the winter. i must say, drinking cold beer during a cold game is less desirable than when it's warm out.

then tomorrow, some friends and i are taking a trip to the apple farm. it doesn't get much more autumnal than apple-picking.

(and of course, we will be watching football before the apples...duh)

so enjoy wearing your jeans and long-sleeve shirts, go rake some leaves or something. have a good one.

2007-10-05T12:42:00.000-05:00

pheidippides

in the recent years, i have noticed a large number of people in my generation participating in marathons. seems that it's caught on like slap bracelets in 1993. and every time i read someone's time in their facebook info, or see their myspace pic of them running across the finish line, i can't help but think, "why in the world would you want to run that far?"

but there are quite a few marathons that exist, in fact, over 100 opportunities annually to run one in the us. my hometown is proud of their go! st. louis marathon in april. not sure why they have to have an exclamation point in their title. but apparently, we are a city of exclamation points. no really, we are.

anyways, with all of the marathons, and all of the people running them, i figured there must be something great about finishing one. you've accomplished something extremely difficult, you trained for months to prepare, you dedicated yourself, and you ran a distance that i don't even enjoy driving in my car.

but then i stumbled across the history of the marathon. named for a greek city, the story is that a soldier, pheidippides, ran from athens to marathon to declare that the persians had been defeated in battle. (there are variations of the story - don't ask me to cite my source). according to legend, this young man ran the whole way without stopping...and upon arrival and announcement of his message, he collapsed dead.

so i'm back at my original question, why would you want to run a distance that killed the first man who did it? (note: this is a rhetorical question. please don't post comments about how awesome it is. i will delete them.)

seriously though, to all of you who have attempted or finished a marathon, kudos. i guess.

2007-10-01T10:22:00.000-05:00

tv-less life

after a weekend of no tv at the new house, we have stumbled upon the full series of sopranos on dvd to bide the time until saturday morning when directtv comes out to install our sweet dish and choicextra package. after investigating pricing of various cable/dish plans, i feel like i'm totally robbing directtv blind. i got free upgrade to dvr, $200 cash back, $50 referral bonus, AND a free portable dvd player. freaking awesome.

so anyways, back to the sopranos. i only had hbo for a short stint in college when it was a free add on for a few months, but even then, i don't think i ever watched sopranos. just never got into it. but it's a pretty good show, now that i'm starting at the beginning and get what the hell is going on. but i can't help but think of the things that tv shows on dvd do wrong.

#1 fit more episodes on a disc. i mean, four episodes is just not enough. i can't imagine that technology couldn't allow for at least 10 episodes on one disc.

#2 don't play the freaking theme song at the beginning of every episode. people are paying way too much for box sets to have to fast forward through (or listen to - if the remote is too far away or you fall asleep while watching) this for every single show you watch. how hard can it be to edit that out?

#3 don't make me read a synopsis of the episode before it plays. if i wasn't sure what i was watching, i could look at the dvd case.

and to sum up, i have clearly watched too much tv on dvd this weekend.

2007-09-20T11:01:00.000-05:00

yowsers

so shit is hitting the fan at the fine institution that granted me my high school diploma. the principal was fired a few months ago, and now she's suing the school for defamation, libel and slander. apparently, she was fired for behavior "not in line with the school's standards" or something like that - but the incident they are blaming it on is an email she forwarded to a few friends, which included jokes about smoking and gay sex.

now, this principal was a bit revolutionary at the school - first of all, she isn't a nun (which many principals before here were), and secondly, she spent a lot of time making the school better. but - she was the kind of person that people either loved or hated. i, for one at least, did not care for her much...but nonetheless, she helped the school.

the interesting part of this lawsuit is the dollar figure on it. she's suing for $125,000 plus backpay and lawyers fees. now, i don't know much about lawsuits, but i think $125k is a lame amount of money to ask for, why not go big? the school could never afford millions, but why not ask for it if you're going through the efforts of suing?

we'll see where this gets her...i just hope my hs doesn't get a bad rap over all of this.

2007-09-18T11:44:00.000-05:00

update: why i really hate fantasy football

you may have previously read this rant about why i dislike fantasy football. well, after discussing with my sources, and deciding i shouldn't knock it till i try it (my life-long motto), i signed up for a fantasy league courtesy of yahoo sports with some family members and friends. i wasn't able to attend the live draft, so auto-pilot took over and provided my team - the muffin bunnies* - some good players, so i was told.

my male opponents in the league said, "your team is so good - you have donovan mcnabb, and clinton portis and larry johnson, and lj smith..." since i don't know who any of these players are (if your name isn't tom brady, i don't pay attention to you), i trusted them and thought this might turn out to actually be fun.

low and behold, i have lost my first two games. donovan mcnabb didn't throw one touchdown pass this week. my team was projected to win by 25 points, and lost by 6.

so now, not only does fantasy football annoy me because of how dumb it is, it annoys me because my players are suckasses.

stupid pretend sports.

*yes, that is actually the name of my team. it was the name i chose for my pet rabbit at age 4, so i thought it was a solid tribute.

2007-09-12T09:59:00.000-05:00

hump day

for lack of anything substantial to talk about, i'd like to share a few fun things:

1. while watching the cardinals lose AGAIN last night at great american ballpark in cincinnati, somewhere around the bottom of the eighth inning one of the reds hit a foul ball and broke his bat. the top part of the bat flew towards the stands on the first base side, but ended up hitting the wall in front of the stands instead. naturally, the few fans that were there (are there baseball fans in cincinnati? because they couldn't even fill 1/4 of that stadium last night) jumped out of their seats to run down and grab the bat. a kid in a cards jersey reached over, grabbed the bat and held it over his head like a trophy and ran back up to his seat. not 5 minutes later, a security guy from the ball park comes up to the kid and his dad and escorts them out of the stadium. you could almost hear the dad saying, "are you kidding? there are only 1,000 people left in this park, our team is losing 7-2...you don't even need to ask us to leave."

2. this is hysterical. i can't believe anyone would put in this amount of work for a prank, but it's awesome. the best part is they interviewed the guy who planned it, and he said that you can actually hear "streeter" say to his girlfriend, "i don't wanna f*cking marry you!" enjoy.

3. one last quasi-funny story. i had this conference for work last week, so all of the vendors who sell us product were invited in to meet the company. you never think about the men in the world who make a living selling women's underwire camis or bamboo weave sheet sets, but they exist. so one older gentleman is sitting and a small group session next to me and leans over to the woman sitting next to him and says, "do you have the time?" she grabs her cell phone to tell him what time it was, and before she can even respond, he says, "haha...just a little joke, i'm wearing two watches!" he pulled his shirt sleeve up to show that he was, in fact, wearing two watches. it was such a terrible joke i laughed out loud.

2007-08-28T09:16:00.001-05:00

trainwreck

you've probably already seen it, but it's so awful, you have to watch it again.

2007-08-21T13:03:00.000-05:00

the pretend world of sports

the time is upon us when students are heading back to school, the blazing heat of summer is close to breaking, stores are bringing in fall clothes...and oh yeah, fantasy football is underway.

now, i have learned to tolerate - even mildly enjoy - the everlong season of football. i didn't grow up in a house where football was a big deal, but have learned later in life that most men live for it. now that i've endured a few seasons of it, i realize that there is no arguing with a significant other about whether or not he's going to watch the games that weekend. i've even learned what's going on, and can actually follow a game now and then.

and now, pre-season has started...it's only a short time before every sunday afternoon, saturday afternoon, monday night, occasional thursday night, possibly tuesday night is football. and it doesn't end there.

i used consider myself lucky because my significant other is mostly obsessed with college football. (i don't think he reads this much, but he would appreciate a "go blue" here) so i used to not have to deal with many sunday pro games. BUT - fantasy football took that away from me.

because of the fantasy team, we have to watch every game that is televised in order to check in on the players on his team. and i can't help but think about the fact that it is FANTASY - which means is 100% not real. fake teams, fake plays, fake scores, and in the end, a fake winner. fake fake fake.

and i get criticized for watching american idol...

2007-08-16T11:34:00.000-05:00

i'm a tropical storm!

i found out yesterday that a current tropical storm and i share the same name. upon hearing this, i was so honored that the meteorologists of the world think so highly of my name that they are willing to add it to the list of hurricanes. but i came to find out that it was already on the list, and i should have known this much earlier in my life. you see, hurricane names are set alphabetical lists, alternating male and female names, that rotate every six years. names are used so that weather stations can communicate quickly about the storm, instead of using latitude and longitude identification. there is a pacific list and an atlantic list. so there was actually a tropical storm erin in 2001, but i guess it never got big enough to make news. (apologies for the outdated links - they serve their purpose though)

so basically, either you are a hurricane or you're not...with the exception of the newly added names from time to time. when a storm is particularly devastating, they retire the name and replace it with a new one- i.e. katrina & hugo. (retired names)

and, another little tidbit of cocktail trivia - storms used to all be named female names until 1978, when the world meteorological organization starting incorporating male names as well. if that's not equality, i don't know what is.

and that is the science lesson for today, class.

**fall softball game 1 tomorrow night. team name: knocked up - because three of our players are benched due to impregnation. pretty funny, huh.

2007-08-13T10:36:00.000-05:00

surface of the sun

after a long weekend of staying indoors for fear of melting upon entering the sunlight, i had my first experience with wii. yes, i was a wii virgin until this weekend. and boy, was it a good time. i'm literally sore from playing so much. if i had a couple hundred to blow right now, that's what i'd get.

anyways, as i realized just how hot it is in st. louis right now, i began to wonder if this is the hottest it's ever been. apparently, it is not. the record high for the area was July 14, 1954, when it reached 115 degrees.

and what is the record high in the u.s., you ask? greenland ranch, california, with 134°F on July 10, 1913. that's just crazy. and they didn't have air conditioning. well, actually - it's in the middle of death valley, where no one lives...so it doesn't really matter. but either way, that's freaking hot.

so i'll be enjoying sitting inside working all week as the temps reach 108...but then dying on the ball field as fall softball starts on friday. we finished spring league at 5 and 5, and won $50 to hooters. just what i wanted.

2007-08-10T13:39:00.000-05:00

welcome back, welcome back, welcome back

great news for folks in st. louis who missed their buddy - rick ankiel was called up this week. enjoy this:

and in another fun cards story, apparently the announcer for san diego got caught this week saying something on air that was supposed to be muted. i love it when stuff like this happens. i'll set the scene...san diego's losing bad, it's hot as balls in st. louis. he made a comment about cards fans "driving back to the ozarks in their el caminos" first. then he muted his microphone, to tell the guys in his production van (who are st. louisans, keep in mind), "i'm done with this place...i'm so tired of losing here...it's hotter than shit. we get our asses kicked every time we come here...i'm not coming here next year." but his partner's mike picked up the whole thing.

so 98.1 in st. louis got this guy on the radio the next morning, and i have to say - he really was pretty funny. he explained that he was just trying to get on the guys from st. louis that make digs at him because of the cards beating san diego in post season so many years. and the comment about the ozarks and el caminos...i'm pretty sure that's true.

well, friends - that's about all i have for today. have a good weekend folks. drink lots of fluids and don't stay in the sun too long. you might melt.

2007-07-25T08:39:00.000-05:00

screen your calls, channel 5

hee hee hee...

the funnier part is that this morning on the radio, they actually got this guy to call in to explain how it happened...basically this guy and his friends were sitting around watching saturday night live, and were annoyed that channel 5 changed programming to the breaking news of the people trapped in the arch. so they kept calling in to get snl back on air, and finally someone who was supposed to be screening asked, "are you inside the arch?" and he just went with it. that someone probably is looking for work now...

2007-07-13T15:39:00.000-05:00

getting picked on and crazy stories

i had a friend tell me today, "i just love giving you shit." is that a good thing or a bad thing? i mean, on one hand, it means that this person knows i can handle a little teasing, that i won't get my feelings hurt or get offended. but - on the other hand, that means that they think they can just razz the hell out of me, because i'll take it.

just a few weeks ago, i was out to dinner for work with a group of people. some of them were vendors in from colorado, some that i work in the office with everyday. either way, most of them are guys, and they took to teasing me during dinner about everything. i just laughed, because, well...most of what they said was funny. but then, my boss's boss says, "erin, it's just so easy to pick on you because you are good-natured about it."

so because i'm nice, and don't throw a hissy-fit when people give me shit, all of a sudden i'm the token "pick-on" girl? what the f? that is totally not fair. wouldn't it make more sense to pick on the people who are mean and rude and deserve it? instead of the people who are innocent?

so i have decided. i'm going to start completely overreacting when people tease me. i'm going to go ape-shit crazy over every little thing that someone says that could possibly offend me in any way. just once, i want to do something really nutty - like burst into tears and run out of a meeting. that'll show all those people who "love to give erin shit." jerks.

on another note - i heard this really crazy story the other day about a dead dog in a duffle bag that got stolen off a train. it was really nuts. but it got me thinking about those kinds of stories that you hear, that are just so whacko that you can't help but tell people, whether they know the people in the story or not. i just thought of another involving chapstick and a cat butthole. so funny. anyways, that point is - are these stories, or more like urban legends? are they such good stories that they just keep circulating through people, like a never-ending chain email? think about that. weird.

have a good weekend - i'll be playing softball tonight and visiting the land of lincoln tomorrow. good times :)

2007-06-28T09:46:00.000-05:00

why i hate charter

i moved a few months ago, and in the process, cancelled my cable services with charter communications. they instructed me that i would get a prorated bill, gave me the total amount i would owe, and that was that. or so i thought.

once my mail forwarding took effect, i received two bills (both on the same day - thank you to the always-efficient united states postal service) from charter, for $0.63. yes, you read that right...63 cents. the balance had been carried over for two months, because the bill didn't reach me early enough. they probably spent $0.50 on each piece of mail, so they just lost 37 cents by billing me.

so i thought to myself, it would be silly to write a check for 63 cents, surely i can pay online or over the phone. i mean a check itself probably costs at least $0.25 and a stamp is $0.41, and i can't justify spending more than the amount of the bill just to get them their payment.

i got online to pay the bill, only to find out that the site cannot locate my account number, since i cancelled my services two months ago. so i called 1 800 GET CHARTER (which i strongly advise avoiding if possible) and spoke with a customer service representative. she assured me that i could pay the bill over the phone, no problem. but there would be a $1.99 fee for speaking to the rep to pay it. um...what? you're going to charge 3 times the amount of the bill to let me pay it? that's just ridiculous.

but then she said they had an automated telephone bill-pay, and that was free. she gave me the number. i called it. alas, they had no record of my account. so i called 1 800 GET CHARTER again. the guy i talked to this time said, no problem - they have a service for closed accounts to pay bills, and gave me that number. i called it. it was a COLLECTION AGENCY. they sent me to a freaking collection agency over 63 cents. having been on the phone with various people for close to an hour at this point, i was (needless to say) pissed off.

so i call GET CHARTER again. before the rep could even say anything, i rattled off the entire scenario - including the bit with the collection agency (who by the way practically laughed in my face over the 63 cents) and web site and everything. she FINALLY said, "i can charge the 63 cents to your credit card on file, and waive the $1.99 fee." they even had my credit card on file this whole time??!?!?!

obviously, you can see why i hate charter. but i think the bigger issue here is cost-to-benefit analysis. charter spent about $1.00 to mail me the bills, then at least an hour of talk time in their call center to deal with me. over 63 effing cents. idiots.

2007-06-25T08:48:00.000-05:00

so it was announced that the male and female winners of wimbledon this year will get paid the same amount of money, regardless of how many sets they play. i must say - i don't follow much tennis at all - but this is really kind of crazy. it's very well known that women make less than men in the vast majority of workplaces, but this is a very public, very media driven event, and they hadn't made the purses equal until 2007?!?! come on...it's the 21st century.

and besides the sheer fact that you can't offer men more money than women in an event like this, the men aren't the "spotlight" at all. i bet even male viewers like watching the women better - cute girls running around in short skirts - what guy doesn't like watching that?

so that's about all i have on that subject. sorry, that kind of sucked.

ps...paris is out of jail. now i can finally get some sleep at night.

2007-06-15T09:05:00.000-05:00

sorry for the long stretch of inactivity. much to busy for regular blogging, which is sad. i actually went home from work the other night and did work. real work, from home. i felt like a 55 year old man, with a wife, 4 kids and a mortgage.

more importantly, the world just gained a new chiquita:
i love how all babies kind of look like little old men, with their scrunched-up wrinkley faces. so cute.

in other news, fat chance won game #3 on 6/8! i performed well above normal, with a decent outfield play as well as a hit. and a walk - which i'm getting very good at. tonight's game is at 10 pm, so given that the entire team isn't fall-down drunk, we may win again.

i'll be out running tomorrow am...head downtown if you aren't doing anything. it's for a good cause.

2007-05-25T09:24:00.000-05:00

friday report

by now everyone has heard about josh hancock's father filing suit against a number of people following hancock's death last month. as soon as the news broke, i knew that it would become an extremely touchy topic...for a lot of reasons. everyone was shocked and saddened by his tragic accident, and then more saddened to find out that hancock's bac was twice the legal limit. it is terrible that he died - whether or not he was drinking and driving.

i have no idea what it would be like to lose a child in an accident like this, but i'm sure the tendency to blame other people would be hard to resist. and hancock's father is doing just that. he is suing mike shannon's, their manager on duty that night, the towing company, the tow truck driver, and the guy who got in the accident that originally brought the two truck to the scene.

the bottom line of this entire incident is responsibility. word got out that mike shannon's had been supplying him with as many drinks as he wanted for the 3.5 hours he was there. so now they are responsible for providing him the alcohol that caused the accident.

and the tow truck? apparently he did not tow the damaged car promptly enough, nor did he light flares on the highway to alert drivers. so he's to blame for obstructing the highway.

and the guy who wrecked his car first...he was the reason the tow truck driver had to be there in the first place, and he didn't properly move his vehicle to a place on the highway where drivers could avoid it.

the only person being overlooked in this scenario is the person who took the drinks, consumed the alcohol, denied a cab ride, put himself behind the wheel, and got in the accident that lead to his death.

like i said, i hate to say i would do it differently, but i think that his father might be trying to replace the memory of his late son with lawsuits and payouts. none of that will bring him back, nor will it stop anyone from doing the same thing. maybe his dad should try to start a program to speak to high schools, or colleges, or athletes - to possibly prevent this from happening to someone else. it was josh hancock's decision to drink and drive - and blaming everyone else isn't going to change that.

sorry for the downer before a lovely holiday w/e...make it a safe one.

2007-05-14T11:05:00.000-05:00

hump day

i just realized last night that i'm going to MISS the last performance show of american idol, because i'll be at the 24th Annual Conference for Catalogs and Multichannel Merchants in Boston. i know you are jealous.

the upside to this little expedition is that we are going to fenway to see the red sox play the braves, and that there are multiple parties to attend every night. the downsides? obviously, the american idol deal. but also, i have to share a hotel room with my boss, i can't get appropriately hammered on free drinks at these parties, because i have to be on good behavior. darn.

i also realized that i left you all breathless with anticipation about fat chance's game #2. it got rained out. that's all. so i'm missing the game this week, and then we are off memorial day weekend, so i'll be back in true athletic action on 6/1.

in other news, a rothko painting sold for 73 million dollars. if you aren't familiar with rothko (because you didn't take Introduction to Art History like me - couldn't tell you one thing i actually learned, but every once in a while an artist's name sounds familiar) his paintings look like this:
now, i mean no offense to any artist...but i'm pretty sure i could have painted that. or something similar at least, all you really need is three colors of paint. then i'd have 73 million dollars and could quit my job, and skip the catalog conference, and watch american idol on a brand new tv. in a new house. with my new car in the driveway.

but then i'm sure i'd miss out on all sorts of interesting information about mail files and merge purge strategies.

2007-05-10T16:11:00.000-05:00

fat chance - game number one

i regret that i have been very uninteresting the past few weeks...so i will now begin my 9 part series on the rising softball stars that are "fat chance." consisting of my siblings, their spouses, my bf, my cousins, their spouses, their cousins, and one girl we found on the league's message board, we are on our way to greatness.

game 1 - 04/28/07

it's been two weeks since we played, so i can't remember exactly how the game went - but it we lost by the 10-run-lead after two innings rule, so i think it may be better that i don't remember it. we had a rough time hitting, and a rough time fielding - but it was our first game. last season, we lost our first game just as badly, and ended up second in our league.

the highlight of the night was actually after our game was over. we were sitting on the bleachers, drinking and carrying on (cause that's what good softball players do), and the team that was playing after us was in need of a female on their team, because one of their girls got injured. they came over to the group of us, and i was the only girl left that could play for them. (we didn't think it would be right to send my 7.5-month-pregnant-sister out on the field) so i grab my glove and head out to second base - where they told me to go after i explained that i'm usually the catcher - with my game face on. now, since i'm usually catcher, i don't have much contact with the ball while it's in play, and that's the way i prefer it. so a few plays go by, i don't have to do much but look like i'm in the game and give a few cheers for my team.

a batter comes up and hits directly into center field, where our center-fielder makes the catch. i'm at second, ready to do what i need to do - and he throws to me. ordinarily, i would have tried to catch it, but instead knock the ball down with my glove, then throw it to the pitcher. this time, however, something came over me and i stuck my glove out and actually CAUGHT the ball. i turned and looked at my teammates like i had just made the play of the game - because to me, that was the most impressive thing i'd done all night. better yet, the most impressive thing i've done since we started playing a year ago.

so, loss for fat chance and all, i think i had a pretty good night.

game #2 is 05/11 - watch out "rave blue smocks"!! (what the hell kind of team name is that anyways?)

2007-04-25T08:52:00.000-05:00

united coalition of the universal sisterhood of equality and fairness, and a fat paycheck too

the american association of university women released a study this week showing that women still make less then their male counterparts at work, and the pay gap widens the longer women work. this has been a known fact for a long time, but the fact that it's not getting better is a bit concerning to me.

women that attend highly selective colleges (on average) make about the same as men who attend minimally selective colleges. so that means i can go ivy league and some dude who goes to state will make the same pay as me. and it's not just the old "women are teachers and nurses" story either. these researchers actually took into account all personal choices that both men and women make (i.e. occupation, children, family, marital status, race)...and when all of those are equal, women still make 20% less than men.

the national women's law center put together a report as well, with this gem of a story:

"In the largest employment discrimination suit ever filed, female employees have sued Wal-Mart for paying women less than men for similar work and using an old boys’ network for promotions that prevented women’s career advancement. One woman alleged that when she complained of the pay disparity, her manager said that women would never make as much as men because "God made Adam first." Another woman alleged that when she applied for a raise, her manager said, "Men are here to make a career, and women aren’t. Retail is for housewives who just need to earn extra money." The Ninth Circuit recently reaffirmed the case as a class action on behalf of more than 1.5 million women who are current and former employees of Wal-Mart."

wow - remind me to not make my career at wal-mart.

but seriously, the only way this pay gap will decrease is if employers are forced to uphold certain standards of employee benefits. obviously, they can't fire a pregnant woman or something that off-the-wall, but legislation could make it much more difficult for companies to get away with it. like reporting all wages, allowing open communication between co-workers about salaries, and making employers provide detailed information when they are paying a man more than a woman.

well, that's enough of my feminist rant for today. join me tomorrow for "why women shouldn't always have to be the one to carry the baby."

2007-04-18T14:19:00.000-05:00

st. louie isn't as bad as you think

today, i read Hopes for a Renaissance After Exodus in St. Louis, from the ny times. i guess i never thought about it, being a st. louisan all my life, but we've had some hard times when it comes the city's status. we had some good times too, like when st. louis was the fourth largest city in the country. obviously, those days are gone, and what's left is a city that is getting slammed, in more ways than one.

we all heard about our #1 spot on the most dangerous cities list. and, then there's the city schools being turned over to the state of missouri - schools in which "5 percent of 11th graders in city schools were proficient in reading." and the article even painfully brings up our nasty storms last year that knocked out power for hundreds of thousands of people. let me tell you, susan saulny, if you had been without power for a week straight, you wouldn't be bringing that up to relive it.

so we have crime. so we have bad schools. so we have police officers that confiscate world series tickets and give them to their friends. but i think the things that people are trying to do for the city are being overlooked. loft buildings are being revitalized, restaurants and shops are now thriving downtown, companies are investing in rebuilding run-down areas, heck - people are LIVING downtown!

and if you talk to people from st. louis, they are proud of their city. they are cards fans, they eat toasted ravioli and tell their out-of-town friends about it, they are pissed about highway 40 construction but know it has to be done, they care when the elephant at the zoo has a baby. they are participating in the redevelopment of downtown, and are excited to see it boom. they defended it when morgan quitno's research officially said stl has more crime than detroit (and then they remembered that they beat detroit in the world series, so it all works out).

so i say, screw you ny times. just a year ago, you published an article about how young, hip, and cool the city is. and now one year later, you rip it a new arch-hole (i totally just thought of that). we st. louisans will continue to rebuild, improve and have pride in our town, and next year you can remember that and write about how great it is again.

2007-04-13T16:15:00.000-05:00

why didn't i think of erin's list?

apparently i've got nothing to write about this week...it's been a little hectic. my office moved last week, i'm moving into a new home this weekend (if it doesn't snow)...and i truly have nothing interesting to say.

i did however, find a quite interesting way to pass time when i'm a little bored/need to take a break at work.

craig's list.

i always thought craig's list was the free, more local version of ebay. which is partly true. BUT - craig's list offers many more fun and exciting things. here is a sample:

job opps : there are all sorts of jobs to search for, pretty much something in every category. the best job i found was...

BBW's Needed for Film
Reply to: vonvolsteinslair@msn.com
Date: 2007-04-10, 4:41PM CDT

Erotic Nightmare Cinema is looking for BBW's for their upcoming film project being shot in St. Louis beginning May 5th. Nudity is required and an openness to sexual situations will be helpful, but not expected. No experience required. Good pay and closed set envirorment. Pay is based on situation of role. Interested applicants send photo (preferably full body) to Dusty Fleischman via email.

rants and raves : basically just a sounding board. but every once in a while you can find a gem like this...

I love doing this...
Reply to: pers-311299534@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-04-13, 1:53PM CDT
Lighting my farts on fire at night with the lights out

missed connections : these are a riot. seriously. and one time, i swear someone saw me and posted something creepy. and who doesn't fall in love every time they go to dirt cheap?

dirt cheap - m4w
Reply to: pers-311022494@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-04-13, 12:52AM CDT
Tall Brunette. Pretty smile, i let you go ahead of me in line. didn't get your name?

so if you've got a minute, browse through some of the local genius that is craig's list.

have a good weekend, friends.

2007-04-03T11:31:00.000-05:00

kids drink before they're 21? what?!?!

there has been a bit of hype in the media regarding a new anheuser-busch product on the market. spykes are 2 ounce bottles of malt liquor - sold in four flavors: melon, lime, chocolate, and mango (side note: the melon flavor is actually labelled HOT MELONS...ha). they are intended to (duh) spike your beer or drink, adding a kick of caffeine, alcohol, ginseng and guarana. a-b says you can take it as a shot, but i did that with one of the lime ones - and i will advise against it. i burped up lime for a day and a half.

anyways, apparently some groups feel as though this product is being marketed directly towards underage drinkers.

"With prom season and all its attendant hazards around the corner, some law enforcers and health advocates are adding one more cause for parents to worry — a new alcoholic beverage called Spykes that is sized, flavored and priced in a way that critics say is aimed at teens. It’s also cute — about the size of a nail polish bottle — so it can easily slip into the tiniest clutch purse or tuxedo pocket." (read the whole msnbc article here)

and, with it's resemblance to nail polish, it may be overlooked by law enforcement officers who are checking girls purses. on top of that, it's 12% alcohol by volume.

have these people never seen airplane bottles of liquor? i mean, they are making such a big deal about the bottles being small and cute - i think a mini-bottle of crown royal is about as cute as it gets. and if a police offer mistakes a bottle of booze for a bottle of nail polish, he should lose his job and be heckled by the commoners...because he's obviously an idiot.

the threat of drunken students at prom is not new, i'm sure you all remember prom. oh wait, you probably don't remember because you swiped a bottle of vodka from your parents liquor cabinet and mixed it into a slurpee on your way there. if an 18 year old wants to get drunk before a dance, they are going to figure a way to do it, whether a-b makes a cute little bottle of booze or not.

and where were the advocacy groups when jack daniels made country cocktails? those were tasty treats for kids (at least they were for me). or mike's hard lemonade and the 18 lines of flavored bevs that came after it? my guess is that any liquor company developing new products like these is NOT trying to get underage kids drunk...they are trying to make MONEY. and the underage kids are not their target market, they can't buy their product legally and don't have money. you think a-b is going to spend millions of dollars creating a product on the off chance that a small percentage of under-21's with fake id's will buy? probably not.

so, i think that these groups trying to take on a-b should probably spend their time getting parents and schools to pay attention to what their kids are doing...rather than try to rid the world of alcohol products.

2007-03-28T16:31:00.000-05:00

elliptical v. yoga

a friend (read his blog) recently contacted me at work to discuss a very important issue...generally he sends me information on politics, world news, or societal concerns....and this time it was serious. he asked the age-old question,

"what is gayer...a guy in a yoga class, or a guy on an elliptical machine?"

my first instinct was to say yoga, no question. but then i thought, why be so hasty to stereotype someone who is interested in a legitimate form of exercise? yoga is actually quite difficult, so it's not a matter of a guy wimping out and doing something easy. that said, however, an elliptical machine can be difficult too (if you crank up the resistance, and make the incline a full 90 degrees...it's hard as shit). so what is the answer?

i informed my friend aaron of what i see as situational circumstances that can affect the answer. in isolation, a guy on an elliptical machine is not gay. but give him US weekly and a headband, and there's a solid chance he is. likewise, a guy in a yoga class is not gay just by being there. if he shows up in spandex, then - again - there's a chance.

i'd like to get some opinions from outsiders here...so cast your votes and let me know what you think.

2007-03-22T10:13:00.000-05:00

dear today show,

i have enjoyed you for a long time...years at this point. you help me get out of bed with your weather and news. i watch you while i fix my hair, while i put on my makeup, even while i eat my breakfast. you bring me al roker (that funny guy) and matt lauer (even though you are going bald) and up-to-date news i could get anywhere else. i didn't even stop watching you when you let katie couric go. i stayed with you, and learned to tolerate meredith veira.

but this morning, today show, you tried my patience. i don't know if i can forgive having this girl on your show. i blame fox for putting her on camera, i blame sanjaya for being a creeper and hugging her, and i blame YOU for making me relive the entire experience over my frosted flakes. i can put up with tom cruise and his antics with lauer, i can put up with you clowns standing in the street telling bad jokes, and i can even put up with you sticking ann curry behind a desk. but this i cannot look past.

i'm not sure that you know it, but you ARE a news show. you are really supposed to talk about news. and though i do enjoy the occasional martha stewart visit or celeb gos, this demented little girl is not news. it is a ploy, and i'm not convinced she wasn't on drugs.

get your act together - or i'll move on to good morning america, and i'll never look back.

yours,

erin

2007-03-19T10:46:00.000-05:00

what are the odds

i would like to give a shout-out to my alma mater, for playing a great game of basketball on friday. they totally could have won - and i'm a little nervous that i put oregon in my final four, after beating a 14 seed by only 2 points.

after watching lots of games all weekend, and checking my bracket semi-neurotically, i began to wonder, "what are the odds of picking the perfect bracket?" so i did some research.

this article was a good place to start. it's from '06, but the math stands true since the tournament holds the same number of teams. if every game is a toss-up, you have a one in 9 million trillion chance of picking every win correctly. that's 9,000,000,000,000,000,000, or as webwire calls it, 9 quintillion. one article said you are more likely to get struck by lightning while watching one of the games than you are to pick a perfect bracket. now that's funny.

just minutes into my research, i came across some surprising news. on friday, the three contestants on jeopardy tied. that's right, a three-way tie in final jeopardy. apparently mathematicians say the odds of this happening are one in 25 million. better odds than the ncaa tourney, but still, that's crazy.

now i'm interested. the odds of something or other happening is just simple math, but it takes the time of finding the numbers and calculating them. so i've compiled a few fun odds for you to enjoy....

Odds of...
...getting hemorrhoids: 25 to 1 (apparently they are fairly common)
...being on plane with a drunken pilot: 117 to 1 (um...scary)
...being audited by the IRS: 175 to 1
...getting a royal flush in poker on first five cards dealt: 649,740 to 1
...becoming a saint: 20,000,000 to 1
...a meteor landing on your house: 182,138,880,000,000 to 1 (that's a relief)
...catching a ball at a major league ballgame: 563 to 1
...striking it rich on Antiques Roadshow: 60,000 to 1 (i love that show)
...injury from shaving: 6,585 to 1

and my personal favorite...

Odds of dying from contact with hot tap water: 5,005,564 to 1 (how can you die from contact with hot tap water?)

2007-03-16T13:42:00.000-05:00

it's friday

as the announcer said, "he is the fourth person bleeding during this game." duke loses, and all is right with the world.
this is why march madness is so awesome - just when you think you've got it figured out, some team you've never heard of comes out of nowhere and beats the team. not that duke was going to win, that's for sure.

definitely the best game so far (not counting miami of ohio's win to get into the tournament - go redhawks) and i'm sure there will be more. definitely in store for a fun weekend of basketball, beer and shamrocks.

happy st. pat's day everyone - you can find me tomorrow with a beer in my right hand and a corned beef sandwich in my left.

2007-03-15T15:05:00.000-05:00

jordan catalano

last night, i went to the pageant to see 30 seconds to mars, jared leto's band. first off, the pageant is awesome - if you haven't been to a show there, you really should. it's big enough to feel like a good turnout (last night was sold out), but small enough to feel home-y. the definite plus is that 21 and overs can go upstairs, where there is much less crowd (aka less annoying 18-year-olds trying to start a mosh pit), so the bar is easier to get to. we decided to buy general admission tix, rather than reserved seating. luckily, we got there early enough to snag a couple of first-come-first-serve chairs that circle around the reserved seating area. if you can get these, you really have it made. no climbing over people next to you to get a drink and easy access to the bathrooms.

we hit the halo bar (located in the pageant) beforehand to have a few drinks, which was equally as nice. feels like a quirky bar where musicians and eccentrics hang out, but is clean, comfortable and right next door to the concert. they won't let you access the concert from inside the bar (this may have had something to do with the large number of underage attendees), but it was no problem.

being a big fan of my so-called life, i was pumped to see jordan catalano in the flesh. i had the biggest crush on him in my flannel-plaid-shirt/hiking boots/grunge phase of 1995. he was dreamy. now, he is very skinny, wears very tight pants, and mildly resembles a girl from a distance. their music is good though...it's not exactly my style, but it was a good concert. a bit short (they played for less than an hour), but good.

the best part of the pageant, though, was that amidst a sea of smokers (even in the bathroom), i barely smelled a hint of cigarettes on me afterward. they must have had 8 industrial exhaust fans pumping air out of that place to keep it fresh...and it was amazing. so if you are sensitive to smokiness, you won't have any problem there.

all in all, a great night...i'll definitely be heading back for another show.

and i think i might try to buy my so-called life on dvd. what a great series.

2007-03-13T13:19:00.000-05:00

bathroom talk

the closest bathroom to my desk at my office is a very small bathroom with two stalls. it is so small, that it should probably only have one toilet and a lock on the outside door...but it doesn't. i'm not over-paranoid about being in the bathroom at the same time as someone else in most situations, but something about how small this one is makes me very uncomfortable. so, if i see someone walk in, and i have to pee, i'll wait a few minutes until they are done.

there have been a few times however, when someone has walked in right behind me. and i can't just walk out - that would be too obvious. but more than once, the person walking in behind me is my boss. in this instance, i most definitely can't just walk out and wait for her to be done, i just have to tough it out.

my boss is the type of person that decides to strike up a conversation while you are on the toilet. i realize that we are sitting less than 3 feet from each other, but do we really need to chat while we're taking care of business? but again, she's my boss, so i can't exactly ignore her. we talked recently in the bathroom about some very important work matters...but i can't help but think, "can't this WAIT until i'm done?"

the point here is this: if you are a bathroom talker (and i think this goes for guys and girls - i'm pretty sure you don't want to talk to your neighbor when you're standing at a urinal), respect your fellow public restroomers' right to pee in peace. it's just the polite thing to do.

2007-03-08T16:03:00.000-06:00

slutbags on tv

since i'm such a huge american idol fan - and i stayed up after getting home from DC late last night just to watch this weeks episodes - i can't help but bring up antonella barba. first of all, if you haven't checked out the pictures of her online, you have to. they are actually kind of funny. she is obviously taking pictures to give to a boyfriend or something, and is in all of these poses with a white sheet as a makeshift backdrop...quite hilarious. the best one is of her imitating the jessica simpson-rolling stone cover, red high heels and all. she looks like a little girl (a little slutty girl, mind you) playing dress up. i just can't stop thinking about who she got to take the pictures. if i asked one of my friends to take pictures of my in my underwear so i could make a calendar for my boyfriend, i'm pretty sure that all of them would laugh in my face.

so anyways, the other thing you have to note is that she is 20 years old. i realize that i am only 24, but i still feel like 20 is pretty young to be stripping and documenting it. and the best part is that they interviewed her friend who auditioned with her...and she said "antonella is the least slutty person i know." does that mean that her other friends are super-mega-sluts? because last time i checked, putting on lingerie and posing for a camera is pretty slutty.

hopefully she goes home tonight...she sucks at singing on top of everything. but she has a $250,000 contract with girls gone wild waiting for her, so her career is just beginning.

so then, i was watching a few minutes of the new pussy cat dolls show. it's pretty dumb, which is to be expected. however, one of the girls who made it through, she's 18 and was talking about how she will be able to tell her daughter about this. um...what? i know that 18-year-olds can get pregnant, and they can have kids and they can be mothers...but on national television? i think that might be sending the wrong message.

sluts will be sluts...i guess that will never change, whether it's on tv or not.

2007-02-23T15:31:00.000-06:00

ode to a fish sandwich

with lent underway, look forward to seeing more commercials for mcdonald's filet-o-fish sandwich. i think they've been running the same one for a few years now, and you never see it until lent starts. i bet if you go into mcdonald's in say, november, and ask for a filet-o-fish, they don't even have them. anyways, this seems strange, because, as a catholic, i feel like less and less catholics live by the no-meat-on-fridays-during-lent rule. old-schoolers, definitely. the people who grew up pre-vatican ii, and couldn't eat meat on any friday ever. but i think the new generation of catholics are more flexible about forcing down fish on fridays.

so i've come to the conclusion that catholics who eat filet-o-fish (or fish sandwiches from white castle, they are basically interchangeable) are actually using lent as an excuse to enjoy a tasty, greasy, fried fish sandwich. i mean, what other time does that sound good, except for the time that you can't eat any beef, chicken, turkey or pork?

2007-02-22T16:28:00.000-06:00

i'd like to share with my readers a little bit about my new job. i really like it so far, so don't misinterpret what may come off as disdain.

for the past few weeks, i've been working on compiling information on zip codes. yes, zip codes. zip codes in orlando, austin, houston, virginia, maryland, st. louis, dallas, tucson, odessa, santa fe, sarasota, naples...you get my point.

luckily for me, today was supposed to be a big presentation, that would likely end my zip code research.

unfortunately for me, the meeting was cancelled and we found out that there are 15 more areas that need to be analyzed. so that's been my ENTIRE day. minus a lunch break for salad+soup+breadsticks at olive garden. $5.25, can't beat it.

needless to say, my brain cannot function anything other than zip codes right now, and it's really scaring me. i went online to kill a few minutes and give myself a break, and found myself looking up zip code maps to find out just how far some zips are from others. it's like i can't stop.

and the good news is that i'll be working on it all day tomorrow too. the meeting isn't for another 5 days. i might go insane.

but in case you ever wondered, Washington DC and surrounding areas are made up of approximately 2,000 zip codes. For reference, st. louis has a little over 200. what do they need all those zips for? it must be like one building is it's own zip code up there.

man - this post sucks.

AI is on tonight...at least i can look forward to that.

2007-02-19T14:55:00.000-06:00

random thoughts for presidents day

-why isn't the entire country off on presidents day? i really think we should get our holidays straight, and make them mandatory. that means, if they government is off, everyone is off. because how can you do business when mail isn't being delivered? so take your pick of optional holidays throughout the year and make it official. the only benefit of working on a quasi-holiday is that there's no traffic.

-it would have been nice for the weather at mardi gras to be more like today. just can't seem to get that right...that's two years in a row of chilly-ness. that's why i prefer st. pat's.

-britney spears shaved her head, did you hear? it must be her overly stressful life, being a single mom (cause she can't afford any help) and going through a divorce (did she really think that was going to work) and being a major WT slut (duh). man is she ugly without hair.

-lent starts on wednesday. i'll be giving up skipping the gym 7 days a week. my goal? be there at least 3 days a week. and only eat lunch out once a week. we'll see how it goes.

i regret to inform my captive audience that the above unentertaining nonsense is the best i can come up with today. i'm sorry to have bored you to death. i will leave you with this picture, because it's effing hilarious. good ole' George + George.

2007-02-15T15:50:00.000-06:00

generation tech

i've been thinking lately about how much time i spend online. this first occurred to me one day at work, i checked my gmail account, and saw that two people had posted comments on my myspace page. i could barely wait to get home to check what they had written (myspace is blocked at my work. made me very angry at first, but i've come to realize it's probably the best decision a business can make). then, i get home and check myspace, only to move on to facebook, watch an episode of grey's anatomy on abc.com, check my email, my bank account (all of which i had done just 3 hours before at work) and eventually sign off.

and at work, we were discussing when we started relying on email. i'm the youngest person in my department, and some were saying they didn't use email until college, until their third job, until they started at a different company, whatever. i chime in and say that i had my first email address in 8th grade. they looked at me like i was some kind of internet slut. feefee18@hotmail.com. that's what it was...i don't think it works any more though. (i remember when i got it too. i was into yahoo chatrooms and such - my god, that sounds terrible - and some kid that i chatted with for 5 hours told me about hotmail...and i was nervous to sign up, because i thought someone would be able to trace me to my house)

so after lunch today, i was perusing facebook.com, and found a group to join, made up of people that went to my grade school. i took a peek at the members, thinking, "i'll know everyone in this group!" low and behold, there are people in the group that are graduating high school in 2010. that means they'll be done with college at the earlist in 2014. i'll be 32. but they all have pages, and have pictures they've posted (some of the girls are really slutty looking too...i don't think i looked like that when i was in 9th grade) needless to say, i don't know any of them.

so someday, i'll be sitting at work, talking with my co-workers about my first email address at age 13, and someone 15 years younger than me will say that they had an email address when they were 7. and i'll feel just as old as the people i said it to.

2007-02-07T09:30:00.000-06:00

depends, really?

many of you have already heard about the astronaut who was plotting murder against another astronaut, for having an affair with her astronaut boyfriend. (just the fact that i could legitimately use astronaut three times in that sentence makes me smile)

if you haven't, read this.

if you don't feel like reading the whole article, i've pulled out the best part below.

"Nowak, accustomed to wearing astronaut diapers during the space shuttle's launch and return to Earth, wore them on the drive from Houston so she would not have to make bathroom stops as she raced to confront Shipman at the Orlando International Airport, police said."

i'm not sure why #1) the daipers are necessary to the news story or #2) they tried to justify it by saying she's "accustomed" to it or #3) if we'll ever see adult daipers in a high profile news story ever again. i sure hope so.

2007-02-06T08:50:00.000-06:00

world wrestling entertainment

last night, my very good friend miss forrest opened my eyes to the wonderful world of monday night raw. now, i have to admit, as a young child, i watched hulk hogan and randy savage wrestle on KPLR 11 on saturday mornings. this was accompanied by pretending our pull out couch-bed was a wrestling ring, and trying to do flips off the side of it with my brother. (note: he always got to be hulk hogan, and i had to be randy savage. jerk)

to my surprise, pro wrestling has not changed much at all. matter of fact, some of those old guys are still doing it. (see: rick flair, right) in case you weren't aware, he is 58 years old. he started wrestling when he was 23. that's completely insane. he started before hulk hogan, AND is older than him. part of me respects the guy for sticking with it, and part of me pities him for still doing it. and then another part of me is disgusted with his old man body.

so aside from ric flair, i had my first experience with 29-year-old john cena. now, as a newcomer to WWE, i have always pictured all of these wrestlers to be what they were when i was young: beastly, sweaty, sporting mullets...you get the point. low and behold, this guy is actually hot. he's even going to be in his own movie with the blond ex-pornstar from nip/tuck. it's a small small world. way to keep up with the times WWE.

moral of this story: thank you, christy, for bringing wrestling back in to my life. i dedicate this blog to you.

2007-01-28T16:22:00.000-06:00

to pee or not to pee

the other day i saw a commercial for the new clearblue easy pregnancy test. remember when pregnancy test commercials were sappy and emotional, and showed a couple waiting for the results...and the girl said something cheesy like, "i need to know, it would change our lives (tear tear)."

well, those days are over. this commercial resembles the 6-blade razor commercial that debuted during the superbowl last year. it's all high-tech looking, sci-fi almost, and the voice over is a deep masculine voice talking about how advanced the technology is. then, the best line:

"The most sophisticated piece of technology that you will ever pee on."

want to see it?

hilarious.

_________

2007-01-26T11:51:00.000-06:00

direct deposit m-f-ers

last week, i deposited three checks. two were paychecks from my new job, one was a paycheck from my old one.

so today, i see the check amount from my old job paycheck has been withdrawn from my account. and i think, what the hell? so i email my old business manager at my previous job - all pissed off - and say why was this money withdrawn from my account (, idiot)?

she replies with "i have no idea," and i curse her existence. then, i call the bank. i'm not rude to the rep i talk to, because i make it a point not to be rude to those people. i explain that i need more description on this transaction. she says that they only have record of two checks being deposited that day. then it hits me.

i used to have direct deposit, where you get the fake check (they really should make those look less like checks) that just shows how much was deposited. it dawns on me, as i'm on hold with bank of america, that i probably deposited one of those. man, am i stupid.

so i thought i was rich, it turns out i'm not. not only am i not rich, i'm an idiot.

happy f-ing friday.

2007-01-24T15:54:00.000-06:00

today, i'd like to discuss the state of the union. oh wait...shit...i can't, because i didn't watch. i didn't watch because i find it to be one of the most painfully boring hours on television. next to golf, and most of what is on the history channel.

i can discuss, however, what was covered in the mac-daddy of political speeches, because how can you get through the day without hearing about it from one place or another.

1. health insurance tax breaks. sounds great, but is misleading. actually, this would make health insurance costs taxable income for people who are covered by their employer. i don't claim to know everything about it, but this is a fact (cnn.com) and i think that sucks. it would be great if you pay your own coverage, then you can get up to $15,000 in tax breaks. hm.

2. the war. "i ask you to give it a chance to work." exact words. seems to me like he's pleading, wanting someone--anyone--to support his decisions in this area. unfortunately for him, he doesn't have much support at all...so we'll see where this goes.

3. oil. apparently, we shouldn't be so dependent on oil. weird, i've never thought of that. this topic is one of those that if i think about it for too long, i start to get a eerie feeling that the planet will implode or something. i have to drive to get to work. if i quit my job, i wouldn't be a working member of my community. if i got a job closer to my home, so i could ride the bus, i wouldn't make enough money to pay my bills. then i'd be asking for welfare. i mean, it's just a vicious cycle.

4. immigration. blah...to me, uninteresting...because there is no simple solution and even if there were, i guarantee that capitol hill wouldn't be trying it.

there were other things, like a shout out to pelosi (who by the way didn't actually complete her "six in 06" in 100 hours), a nod to that guy who rescued the other guy from the subway tracks in NY, and i think there was something in there about the lady who created baby einstein...not sure.

all in all, another lame SOTU...can't wait for next year.

2007-01-23T09:42:00.000-06:00

idol banter

so i'm trudging through my work day, obviously taking a momentary break to write here...i'm sure my boss would be thrilled to know that. *side note: they have myspace and youtube blocked at my new work. jerks. do they not wan tus to waste time online? funny, because everyone is on IM all day. hm. anyways, i'm looking forward to a few things today...namely, american idol is on tonight. it will be the highlight of my tuesdays (and wednesdays) for the next couple of months, and i love it. the first episodes aren't as good as when the real action gets started, but i love it regardless.

i'll tell you what i don't love though. this:

"The first half of each season, which many find the most entertaining, is based on the verbal abuse and humiliation of contestants who lack talent, or who are not pretty enough by the standards of today’s music industry. Recently, this part of the show has come under fire from critics claiming the judges have become increasingly hostile toward less-talented contestants." - Jimmy Blue, The Daily Evergreen

"Some media outlets, including O'Donnell on ABC's The View, have criticized the judges for being especially unkind, pointing specifically to Kenneth Briggs and Jonathan Jayne, who became buddies while standing in the Seattle audition line. They were terrible on the show and quickly dismissed, Simon Cowell calling Briggs, who has big eyes, a "bush baby." Later, it was reported that Jayne once participated in the Special Olympics."
-Mike McDaniel, Houston Chronicle

"Yet viewers, media critics and Rosie O'Donnell alike have since charged the judges with upping the meanness factor this season and making unnecessarily cruel remarks to the hapless hopefuls who come before them. O'Donnell railed against the threesome on The View last week, after screening a clip in which Cowell compared a contestant to a "bush baby." "Isn't that what America thinks is entertainment?" O'Donnell asked."
- Sarah Hall, E!Online

Let get serious here. This show has been on for five seasons, has top ratings of all time, has launched young people into stardom (and not just for AI fans, for everyone. Jennifer Hudson was nominated for an Oscar for crying out loud). and now, all of a sudden, people are concerned that Simon is mean? just now, really? it's silly. i realize that the show itself is silly, but i have been watching since the first episode of the first season...so i'm a supporter, no matter what anyone else says.

the real point here is that these kids who are running from talk show to talk show, crying because the judges were mean, are looking for the same exact thing that the judges and FOX (and all of hollywood, come to that). a little press, and a lot of money. these two jokers that started this whole thing have AGENTS! agents for pete's sake. a few weeks ago all they had was a video on youtube and a special olympics medal, and now they are lined up for commercials, appearances and meetings with celebrities.

so while you're trying to get a name for yourself, american idol rejects, don't bite the hand that feeds you...or you'll end up like james frey.

2007-01-19T09:25:00.000-06:00

office space

so, i'm at my new job a few weeks now. there is an interesting dynamic here...because half of the company was actually sold almost a year ago. so as a part of the split, the owners of the remaining half (the half i work for) agreed to relocate. obviously, moving 250 employees, including a call center, is a big feat. what is left is two completely separate companies coexisting in one building. and i'm the new person. there is a large room, filled with cubicles (the open office style, where if you stand up you can see everyone sitting around you) and i am the only one that works for my company. weird.

anyways, there is a guy who sits next to me...i can't see him, but he has the deepest most annoying voice in the world. and every morning around 8:15 am, he calls his girlfriend. "Baby, it's time to get up," he says. "I know you're tired, but you have to go to class...want me to call back in 5 minutes? ok, i will. bye baby."

5 minutes later. "Baby, it's time to get up. Class is at 10...you need to get up. Make some coffee...5 more minutes? ok, i'll call back."

5 minutes later. "Baby, it's time to get up. you won't have enough time to get ready...i love you too...just a few more minutes? ok."

2 minutes later. "Baby, it's really time to get up. ok...are you really getting up? are you sure? ok...call me when you're on your way to class. i love you. bye baby."

now, keep in mind, this is a condensed version of what, on some mornings, has gone on for up to 45 minutes. I'M exhausted by the time this girl actually gets out of bed to go to whatever class it is that she goes to. and why doesn't she just get an alarm clock? i mean, we're all grown ups...you can't have your mom come in and turn on your bedroom light until your 40, now can you. or can you?

i think i'm going to buy a $4.99 alarm clock at wal-mart this weekend, and leave it on his desk on monday morning. ha.

2007-01-17T12:49:00.000-06:00

the nothing argument

if you are in a relationship, for at least say...6 months or so, you are probably familiar with the following conversation:

girl: how was your day?
boy: fine, how was yours?
girl: fine...nothing too interesting to speak of. i'm doing _______ now.
boy: oh well, i don't want to interrupt _________.
girl: no really, it's ok. i called you.
boy: ok.
girl: so how was __________ yesterday?
boy: why do you have to nag me about __________? it's fine ok.
girl: well you are the one who asked me about ________ in the first place!
boy: because i was trying to be nice!
girl: well don't try, ok! you always do that, and it drives me crazy. why don't you just ______!
boy: because you always ________! this is stupid, i have to go.
girl: me too, bye.
boy: good. bye.

the beauty of this conversation is that the roles are interchangeable, and the blank can be just about any act, occurrence, project, emotion, tv show, book, party, movie, person, food etc. when you date for a long time, it seems that once in a while, you just can't stand each other. and it's nothing personal, you still have respect for each other, deep down you still love each other, but at that moment, there isn't anyone you'd rather speak to less.

i used to be of the belief that you needed to immediately talk through it, get the misunderstanding figured out and come to an agreement that you are just in a bad mood. but as i've matured, i've come to realize that the best cure for this situation is to just leave each other alone...for an hour, a day, a week (that might be a bit too long, if you are going a week without speaking, i think the problem is larger than this)...whatever it takes to get your brain clear of the gunk.

(the next day)
boy: hi! how are you? how's your day going?
girl: oh, it's going fine...i'm really busy ________, but it's good.
boy: that's good...well not that you are busy, but that you are having a good day.
girl: thanks. did you sleep well last night?
boy: yeah, did you?
girl: yeah...i did. want to get dinner or watch a movie or something tonight?
boy: definitely, i'll call you later.

and yes, the argument is over. no need to make it more than it is...just take some space and let it lie. it is true that female pms may be a key factor in this scenario, but then again so could male pms. we all have our moments, we just have to learn to deal with each others. that's the joy of a relationship, actually learning to relate.

2007-01-14T18:39:00.000-06:00

so i found out that my old boss (at the job i quit) just quit as well. hm...great place to work, huh? i guess she went in and said some things that needed to be said about the management, the work atmosphere and protocol (or lack thereof).

so i sent her an email saying congratulations, and she replied that she knew she was leaving when i quit. she said that she deliberated over whether or not she should tell me, in case i wanted to take her position when she left. wow...do things happen for a reason. had she told me that, i would have been in dilemma mode and probably not been able to make up my mind. but i think in the end, i would have chosen to leave, depending on how much money they offered. my guess (since they are cheap bastards) is that they wouldn't have offered me as much as i wanted, and my entire existence would have revolved around work, and i would have also been working for the most heinous toad in the world.

i suppose things worked out the way they should...

2007-01-12T17:39:00.000-06:00

HOLY SHIT

___________________

2007-01-12T07:49:00.000-06:00

a few random thoughts this happy friday morning:

-i just bought my very own computer! it's awesome, and hopefully i'll be able to write a bit more often, becuase i'm stealing my neighbors internet connection.

-american idol starts next week! stay tuned for lots of comment blogs.

-i'm attending the rodeo on saturday night...my cowboy hat is coming out, and i'm sure i'm in for some serious people watching.

-this whole war in iraq thing is getting out of control. if you caught any of the conference with condoleeza, you may have seen the representative from hawaii. they never interview hawaii, but this guy...he was pissed. apparently this is the "most terrible, ridiculous" decision he's ever seen made. way to go upset hawaii. they'll break off into their own country if we're not careful.

and that my friends is my first post from my new vaio. sweet dude. catch you later.

have a great weekend :)

2006-12-18T16:43:00.000-06:00

A look back...

Just like last year, I'd like to take a moment to reflect on the past year. the good, the bad, the unexpected. All in all, a good year in my book.

1. Abe comes home from Iraq. A very warm-welcomed homecoming to a much-loved soldier, Abe coming home was a great moment in my life, and I'm willing to bet a memorable day for my sister.

2. I moved out on my own. My first apartment, my first time living alone...it's been great. although i cried myself to sleep the first night...but whatever, i'm cool now.

3. Matt moves to St. Louis. Goodbye long-distance, hello Brentwood Forest!

4. I got promoted. After almost two years of being the sales grunt-worker, I was offered a promotion (raise included $$) to be St. Louis Magazine's Consumer Marketing Manager.

5. My first trip to Chicago! An unlikely run-in with just the right person got me up on a rooftop to watch the Cubs beat the Cards (boo) in what turned out to be one of the drunkest days of my life. I hate the Cubs, but Wrigley Field is pretty awesome.

6. Wisdom teeth removal: too bad I don't have a picture of this one, with a nast infection and a swollen face, I looked beautiful. My wisdom is now gone, as well as a large sum of money from my pocket. Crappy dental insurance.

7. Cardinals win the World Series!

8. Democrats take over Senate. McCaskill defeats Talent. Stem cell research bill passes in Missouri. Tobacco tax is rejected. Female senator count reaches all-time high of 16.

9. Shannon is pregnant! She's in a lot of my news this year, and was last year too, but then again, she's my sister, so it's cool. Due in the beginning of June, her baby is now the size of a baseball, and has eyes and ears. creepy. but seriously, I can't wait to meet him! (I think it's a boy)

10. I quit my job. Yes, you read that right. After a promotion, I decided to quit anyways. I found a new job, making more money, at a great company...so the decision was made. I start on Dec 29th...so that will be the end of my 2006!

And...that's it folks! It truly was a great year, and I wish everyone all the best in 2007!

2006-12-15T12:10:00.000-06:00

i've been thinking a lot about the holidays. when i was a kid, i would count down the days till christmas with one of those paper-chains, where you tear off a link for every day. and we had one of those calendars where there is a little door you can open for every day in december, to show how many days are left until christmas.

now, i feel like i get worked up waiting for christmas...worrying if i have all of my presents bought, sending out christmas cards, and worrying about how much i'll be eating all through the holiday season. and i don't really even get excited about the presents. how depressing is that? why don't i look forward to presents any more? i mean, what happens to us as we get older that makes us stodgy and stressed?

i'm beginning to think that part of it is the mystery. when you are a kid, you have no idea what awesome things you are going to get, it might be a new bike, it might be a keyboard (that's what i got when i was in fourth grade), or even something you didn't ask for, but is equally awesome. i remember opening a pair of underwear wrapped in christmas paper and getting excited about it!

but now, and for the past few years, there's no mystery. all of you presents were exactly what you asked for, because people want to be sure that you are satisfied with their gift. even my boyfriend and i, we knew what we were getting each other last year, and while it was great because i really wanted my new camera, it was a bit anti-climactic.

so now what satisfies the christmas spirit? for me, it's usually the little traditions (which are all changing too) like the food we eat at dinner or reading the paper with my dad after we've opened all the presents. or having cosmos and playing board games with my family, that always seems to be a highlight.

and i've decided this year to be excited about my own things, like my first christmas tree in my own apartment. wrapping presents with wrapping paper that i bought, and checking people off my christmas list and feeling great about what i got them. i can't wait to see my sister, or my neice, or my dad open their gift, and know that i put my heart into it.

maybe that's the part that gets to me, the idea that now it's all on my own, and i don't have the security blanket of my parents to make christmas what it is. i have to do it on my own.

but...i'm still staying at their house on christmas eve...i'll be damned if i wake up on christmas morning alone!

happy holiday season :)

2006-12-14T16:34:00.000-06:00

The Art of Quitting

Just 3 days ago, I did something that people daydream about constantly. The mere thought of it brings a grin (of the shit-eating variety) to your face. You imagine what it would feel like, the satisfaction it would bring, and best of all, the people it would piss off. That's right, I quit my job. Officially. And it was the best day I've had in a long time.

Luckily, I've already found another job, which is why i quit. Quitting without one lined up would just be crazy, right? Yes, but I totally would have done it if I weren't so close to broke.

I walked into my boss's office, feeling like my stomach was going to fall out of my butt, and wishing I could pay someone to have the conversation I was about to have. Yet, I kept thinking, "You've wanted to do this for so long...it's supposed to be the epitome of sticking it to them, don't be nervous." But unfortunately, I have a serious issue with dissappointing people, so my conscience was getting the better of me.

I told her that a better opportunity had come up (duh, driving a trash truck would be better than this) and it was a very difficult decision to make (not), and I was so sad to be leaving (as sad as a kid at christmas). Once I started talking, rather than getting shaky and nervous like I thought I would have, I got very calm and relaxed. I felt like I had just solved all the world's problems.

She asked if I would accept a counter-offer. NOT ON YOUR LIFE. I didn't say that, of course. I said, very professionally, "I've already made up my mind." And the elation commenced.

So now, I am enduring the longest week of my life, only looking forward to next week (my last week), which I'm sure will be the second longest week of my life.

But I've planned it just right: My last day of work is the day of the holiday party. It's a bowling party. Picture me, so drunk I don't remember my name, obviously talking shit about everyone I work with, bowling and loving life.

It's my last day.

2006-12-07T16:45:00.000-06:00

have you seen that "pay it forward" commercial? where someone picks up a stuffed animal for a baby in a stroller, and then a chain of niceties ensues? i think i totally was part of that today. i had to refill the windshield washer fluid in my car, because it's been out for at least 5 days and i can barely see through my windshield. so i stop at target to get fluid and a jumbo box of nerds (oxymoron), and before i leave the parking lot, i pop my hood to fill up the windshield juice. in my heels and scarf, i'm sure i looked like quite the damsel in distress. but anyways, this saintly woman actually stopped and said, "are you ok? do you need help?" i laughed a little, thinking "if i need help pouring this blue stuff into that hole that says 'put blue stuff here,' yes i need lots of help." i told her i was just refilling the windshield fluid, but thanks for asking and happy holidays. i mean, what a nice person. of all the crazies that are out at the stores right now, it's a miracle that anyone even bothered to look in my direction.

hopefully someone else saw and did something nice for someone else~

2006-11-15T17:28:00.000-06:00

today i have discovered a company called Santa Plus, based right here in my hometown. i had heard rumors of it being true, but i just read in my magazine that it is, in fact, a real company. they specialize in finding santas that 1) really look like santa 2) in many cases, have a real beard 3) don't smell like whiskey and 4) are well-mannered. now at first glance, you might think, "how could a company like this really stay in business?" the answer is in the paychecks. apparently, these santas make up to $100 for a 20 minute appearance for the kiddies. if i made $100 every 20 minutes, i'd be...well, i'd be loaded obviously. but, alas, i cannot be a santa plus santa, because i do not possess the ability to grow a beard and/or look like a man. but i would LOVE to be the CEO of santa plus, i can't imagine how anyone could get mad at you...or how could anyone file a lawsuit against you. YOU CAN'T SUE SANTA! that's just blasphemy.

anyways, i tried to find their web site, but i can't. they must be in the north pole, where there is no internet.

happy turkey eating.

2006-11-07T16:39:00.000-06:00

election day!

whether you're a donkey or an elephant, get your ass out there and vote today. in missouri, you can vote for stem cell research, a gi-normous tax on tobacco products, felonious politicians ability to get pension plans, minimum wage increase (wahoo!) and a bunch of judges that i've never heard of. the most popular vote today, though, i believe, is the race between jim talent and claire mccaskill. these two have been slinging crap at each other for a solid month, and it's ooc. no joke. one of the commercials actually says, "mccaskill's current husband has a business in bermuda. are you surprised?" i mean, what the hell does that have to do with her platform? it doesn't. and i don't like her at all...she's a particularly unpleasant woman. but, i don't think that it's fair to bring up her husband's mischeif, unless there's proof that she's involved too.

and be nice to the volunteers, no matter how unorganized and miserable they make your voting experience. they've given up their time to do this for you.

2006-10-20T14:51:00.000-05:00

i recently found out that my alma mater is undergoing a terrible tragedy. the town is trying to ban outdoor drinking games, and all paraphernalia associated with them. it breaks my heart to think that i can never go back to see a makeshift plywood table in someone's front lawn, covered in red solo cups, beer dripping from all sides, and a crew of merry students-laughing and tossing the ping pong ball around. it's an outrage. for the full article, click here.

"If passed, the ordinance would go into effect 30 days after it is approved. It would forbid all residents of Oxford from participating in alcoholic games outside the home and require that all materials used be transferred inside the resident's house.

It lists beer pong, flip cup and chugging contests as examples of games that would be prohibited. Violators would be charged $100, $250 and $500 for the first, second and third offenses respectively. Subsequent offenses continue with a $500 fine. Because the ordinance prohibits alcohol games played in public view, house porches would be included as part of the outside vicinity.

Tables, plywood boards and other devices used for games involving alcohol placed outside of a house and in view of a public street or sidewalk are also explicitly banned."

2006-10-18T16:33:00.000-05:00

This has absolutely made my day. many may have already learned of this wonderful product, but i have had my first exposure today. "effen vodka," imported from holland, is apparently named after the dutch word for "smooth." i like to think someone just got really drunk, and said to their friend, "give me the effen vodka." thus the name was born.

the name itself is funny, but their billboards are funnier. props to their crazy ad folks.

i hope they start advertising in my magazine. it would make for great hilarity and endless joke possibility every day.

2006-10-13T09:02:00.000-05:00

shame shame, i know your name.

ever have one of those days where you wake up and realize that you were a complete ass the day before? and i can't even blame this one on booze. it was like i was taken over by someone else for a day, and i have no idea why. that someone was a nasty, miserable, bored-with-life person, with no desire to be nice to people or even hold the elevator for someone running right towards the door. oh, you know you're in a bad mood when you do that. and when you hear that person say, "what an ass," you know you totally deserved it.

so then you get up to work, and someone has already drank the whole pot of coffee, and didn't bother to make more for anyone else. nice. so in retort, you make just enough for yourself, and leave the pot empty. that'll show 'em.

you mozy on to your desk, to find someone has left a pile of papers and notes on your chair. don't they see your INBOX right on your desk? i mean, it might as well have a sign above it that says "put mail here," but no, they insist on leaving a heap of crap right where you want to plant your ass.

you log in to your computer, which takes long enough to finish your entire cup of coffee, and finally receive the bombardment of emails. 1/3 spam, 1/3 work you don't want to deal with, and 1/3 emails from friends. obviously, those come first. after responding to weekend plans and party details, you delete the spam and let the work emails sit for a few hours, while you check your personal email for more interesting stuff.

then, a co-worker walks up to your desk. and they need your help. damn, if you JUST would have been in the bathroom. now you're stuck stuffing envelopes and helping answer phones for four hours, when you could have been viewing priceless laughs on youtube. by this point,

the alter-ego has completely set in.

you sit, disgruntled as hell, stewing on how much you hate your job, and why you should quit and find another job. you even get on monster to look at a few. then the thought of revising your resume and interviewing makes you nauseous, so you go back to bitching about your current job.

after a short lunch at subway, and more fucking envelopes, you finally have a minute to get to your real work. but it's friday afternoon, and you can't get any work done anyways...so you decide to shop online for a while instead. always a better decision.

by now, it's 4:45, and you obviously can't start any work. that's just insane. so you bullshit via email and chat with co-workers (the ones who DIDN'T drink all the coffee) until 5. then you head home.

thus is the day that makes me a raging lunatic, and happens approximately 3 out of 5 days a week.

the joys of 9-5. why did i ever want to do this.

2006-10-12T11:25:00.000-05:00

click here to join the fu n:

2006-10-11T16:43:00.000-05:00

so today i have decided to take up the fine art of jewelry making. with my luck, it will turn out just like my decision to be a painter in the eighth grade...which resulted in a box of paints and supplies packed up in my parents basement to this day. i purchased earring hooks, headpins and needle-nose pliers (duh) as well as some assorted beads. i will attack this feat tonight, and hopefully have pictures tomorrow.

in other news: the cardinals play game 1 of the nlcs tonight. go cards.

2006-10-06T16:26:00.000-05:00

today i've been thinking: do self-help books really work? i mean, in order to help yourself, you have to be in a mindset of knowing that your self needs help...which isn't the case in most people that actually need help. people who actually need self-help books are the crazies that run amuck making other people nuts, then force them to get self-help books, but the reality is that the latter person of this instance doesn't even need help. they just need the former person in the instance to go away. for instance, when i was in high school i dated this really big d-bag. he was a total creep, and treated me like a bag of poop. once i realized that i was in a crap relationship, i dumped him, and was screwed up for years. i dated a slew of new d-bags, didn't understand what was wrong with me, had no self-confidence, blah, blah. well, what had actually happened was that his mere presence had caused me to believe that i was in need of help. i joined a support group type thing (just some other girls with problems) and after telling my story three dozen times to many many people, i had an epiphany. I was not the crazy, he was. so all of that time that i spent trying to "fix" myself was worthless, because i didn't need the fixing, he did. and i'm sure he didn't go to a support group or spend time trying to get better and not be a d-bag, because he didn't even know he was a d-bag.

the moral of the story is: let the crazies worry about fixing themselves, you're the normal one.

2005-12-30T11:42:00.000-06:00

With the dawn of 2006 just around the corner, it is the time of year to take a look back at all that has happened over the past 365 1/2 days. Many things have changed, some good and some bad...but in the end, time goes on, and another year passed. Starting at the beginning...

#1) matt moved to columbia. ending our 7 hour long distance relationship, creating a new 2 hour long distance relationship, and allowing me to discover the beauty and wonder that is central missouri.

#2) Pope John Paul II passed away. the first non-italian pope since the 16th century; credited as a major force behind the fall of communism; spoke nine languages fluently; is already under beatification process in Rome. big deal for us catholics.

#3) shannon got married. to some, this is just another wedding. but to my family, this was the event of all events. with three wedding dates that didn't work out, a husband stationed in iraq, and only three weeks to plan, this was a wedding to remember. congrats to shannon and abe.

#4) elizabeth was born. my first neice, the first grandchild on both sides of her family, and a very loved baby was added to our geneology. welcome to the world, elizabeth rose.

#5) i turned 23. that wasn't very exciting...especially since i fell asleep at 10:30 that night. but it happened, and i'm another year older.

#6) hurricane katrina. unbelievable, even though the media coverage has drastically died down. the most tragic part of the entire disaster is the people who lost everything, which was close to nothing. keep helping in any way you can.

#7) those damn gas prices. the most expensive gas i've ever seen plagued the country. almost $3 in stl, and much more in other places. driving was fun before it cost $50 to fill your tank.

#8) my grandpa turned 75. what an old guy. still kicking though, even has a few girlfriends. happy birthday, grandpa.

#9) iraq. hits close to home, with abe being stationed there. by december, 67% of registered iraqis voted. even if religious freedom isn't possible, a stable democracy is never a bad thing.

#10) tom and kris get married (this hasn't actually happened yet, but will on the 31st). sort of like the brady bunch, except seven kids, and no dog. best wishes to the entire family.

and that concludes...i'm sure a lot of other things happened in 2005, but this is just the highlights. happy 2006 to everyone, best wishes, god bless, peace...see you next year!