shame shame, i know your name.

ever have one of those days where you wake up and realize that you were a complete ass the day before? and i can't even blame this one on booze. it was like i was taken over by someone else for a day, and i have no idea why. that someone was a nasty, miserable, bored-with-life person, with no desire to be nice to people or even hold the elevator for someone running right towards the door. oh, you know you're in a bad mood when you do that. and when you hear that person say, "what an ass," you know you totally deserved it.

so then you get up to work, and someone has already drank the whole pot of coffee, and didn't bother to make more for anyone else. nice. so in retort, you make just enough for yourself, and leave the pot empty. that'll show 'em.

you mozy on to your desk, to find someone has left a pile of papers and notes on your chair. don't they see your INBOX right on your desk? i mean, it might as well have a sign above it that says "put mail here," but no, they insist on leaving a heap of crap right where you want to plant your ass.

you log in to your computer, which takes long enough to finish your entire cup of coffee, and finally receive the bombardment of emails. 1/3 spam, 1/3 work you don't want to deal with, and 1/3 emails from friends. obviously, those come first. after responding to weekend plans and party details, you delete the spam and let the work emails sit for a few hours, while you check your personal email for more interesting stuff.

then, a co-worker walks up to your desk. and they need your help. damn, if you JUST would have been in the bathroom. now you're stuck stuffing envelopes and helping answer phones for four hours, when you could have been viewing priceless laughs on youtube. by this point,

the alter-ego has completely set in.

you sit, disgruntled as hell, stewing on how much you hate your job, and why you should quit and find another job. you even get on monster to look at a few. then the thought of revising your resume and interviewing makes you nauseous, so you go back to bitching about your current job.

after a short lunch at subway, and more fucking envelopes, you finally have a minute to get to your real work. but it's friday afternoon, and you can't get any work done anyways...so you decide to shop online for a while instead. always a better decision.

by now, it's 4:45, and you obviously can't start any work. that's just insane. so you bullshit via email and chat with co-workers (the ones who DIDN'T drink all the coffee) until 5. then you head home.

thus is the day that makes me a raging lunatic, and happens approximately 3 out of 5 days a week.

the joys of 9-5. why did i ever want to do this.